Stop Settling for Mediocre Sex: 7 Tips for a Better Sex Life

7 tips for a better sex life

Are you tired of a subpar sex life? You and your partner have the same boring, unfulfilling, missionary sex most mornings before the kids wake up. OR perhaps you manage to squeeze in a quick session at bedtime. That’s all the sexual excitement you tend to experience these days because you’re both tired between juggling work, kids, extracurricular activities, and only God knows what else. And now you’re here because you want some REAL excitement in the bedroom, right? Well, you’re in the right place! I’ve come up with a few tips to help you improve sex and intimacy. Here are some pointers that will help you transform your mundane routine by adding a bit of spice and spontaneity, so now sex can be fun again!  

These are 7 tips for a better sex life! 

  1. Use lube. There are many reasons why you should be using lube during sex (and it’s not because you don’t have a WAP). The truth is, regardless of how turned on your partner makes you, lube can be added to the equation to enhance the sexual experience. Lube makes sex more pleasurable by decreasing friction that causes pain and discomfort. It can also be a way to introduce new sensations during sex, and there’s nothing wrong with wanting to change things up from time to time.
  2. Communicate. Communication is essential for improvement in the bedroom. Communication allows you to create and establish boundaries. It also sets the tone for what to expect during those intimate moments. The foundation for great sex is excellent communication. The more you communicate, the better foreplay, sex, and everything after will become.
  3. Schedule sex. If you’re too busy for sex, you’re too busy! Sometimes we get swamped, causing sex to be placed on the backburner, and that’s not good. Prioritize sex by adding it to your schedule. By putting sex on the calendar, you guarantee that sexy time will happen despite everything else going on.
  4. Engage in foreplay. Foreplay is more than just an oral teaser before penetration. It’s actually any form of sexual (or non-sexual) activity that gets you in the mood before intercourse. Foreplay can begin hours before your sexual encounter and is a great way to enhance sex and improve intimacy in your relationship beyond the bedroom. It ensures that both partners are at their peak of arousal at the time of intercourse. And let me reiterate — it’s also great for improving intimacy in the relationship OUTSIDE of the bedroom.
  5. Use sex toys. Using a vibrator (or any toy) during sex can boost bonding with your partner. Sex toys open the door for so much fun and exploration. There are many toys for various uses. There are some that you can use while your partner watches, your partner can use on you (and vice versa), and even some that you can use together during foreplay and penetrative sex. So choose a toy and have fun as you strengthen the connection with your lover.
  6. Spontaneity! Over time sex can start to feel a little monotonous if it’s the same routine over and over and over again. Be spontaneous and start mixing things up. This keeps sex (and the relationship) fun and exciting! Believe it or not… you can also be spontaneous when you schedule sex! How? Choose a random date and time and let the rest happen spontaneously.
  7. Enjoy the moment. Have fun and remove expectations of achieving an orgasm every time you have sex. Get lost in the moment so you can completely relax and let loose. Enjoy every sensation, every tingle, every tickle… how you’re being touched or caressed. Every kiss. Lick. Stroke. Bite. And pinch, etc… By shifting your focus, you’re able to enjoy maximized pleasure.

Your love life should be a great part of your life at the end of the day (or whenever you feel like having some amazing sex). It may not be completely mind-blowing every time you have sex, and that’s absolutely OK! Consider your sexcapades to be a journey of discovery and an opportunity to enhance the next encounter rather than a race to the finish line. The ultimate goal does not always have to be an orgasm. There is enough delight and excitement to be experienced with your partner without one. Remove sexual pressures and insecurities when it comes time to get busy, and you’ll have a lot more fun along your sexual adventure.

So, what’s holding you back? Go enjoy some orgasmic pleasure. Then repeat again… and again…

…and again!


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