Tuesday, February 27, 2024
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The Feminist Sexpert

The Prince of Persia: The Feminist Sexpert Interviews Zane Walker

In general, Ladies, one might discover a dashing, gorgeous character known as the Prince of Persia in the pages of an erotic romance–but hey, even The Feminist Sexpert, a multi-published romance author if she does say so herself, couldn’t conjure a hero this hot! 

A rising star in the world of adult film, Zane Walker–aka The Prince of Persia–is the ideal porn performer; one whose image and persona seem custom designed to appeal to the female viewer. Beyond his movie star good looks, he exhibits a true sense of respect and attentiveness when performing alongside some of the hottest women in the industry; kissing them passionately, pleasuring them in a variety of ways, making compelling eye contact, talking both sweet and dirty at just the right times. And the top studios in the industry are taking notice; indeed, Zane currently can be seen in the frames of the latest erotic features released by the likes of Team Skeet, Brazzers, and Hot Guys Fuck.

It was, in fact, through her recent viewing of a HGF release that the Feminist Sexpert first discovered this walking dream; a man who takes pride in bringing women’s fantasies to life on the silver screen.

“I particularly like filming for Hot Guys Fuck, in that they are one of the few studios that shows off the male form in their scenes–the focus is on me,” he explains. “I like having the opportunity to show the results of all the hard work I do at the gym, not to mention all of the physical and spiritual preparation that I put into my work. I live a clean, sober life, I eat well, I practice healthy habits, I take care of myself.”

(“And boy oh boy. Does it ever show.”–Feminist Sexpert Editor’s Note)

Zane also takes ample care of his female co-stars, always ensuring their comfort and pleasure throughout the course of any given film shoot. He shines as a true gentleman in every filmed scenario, bequeathing them with smiles, compliments, kisses, and a whole lot of orgasms. Bonus!

“I always meet with my co-star before our scene,” he revealed. “I ask her her likes and dislikes, her yes and no lists, and what I can do to help her show herself to best effect.” 

Zane’s co-stars tend to vary in age and body type.

“Regardless of who the co-star is,” he said. “I can get the job done and please her.”

And while he respects all women equally, he especially loves to work with older women.

“MILF performers tend to be confident, easy to talk to, professional,” he said. “They have more life experience and are comfortable with themselves.”

Zane, a model and athlete whose interests range from real estate to UFC fighting sports, began his own professional porn career in the arena of homemade content.

“I was seeing a beautiful woman, and we would film ourselves having sex. I asked her if it would be OK to post the content, and she said yes,” he explained. 

Major studios and agents began to take notice of the young stunner who one director deemed The Prince of Persia–an homage to his heritage, and to the mystical look and smooth, well-spoken character that truly sets him apart.

“It’s amazing to think that, just a few years ago, I was sitting on my couch watching porn, thinking, I’m a very open minded person. I could do this.”

“And here I am, doing it!”

…and earning many devoted female fans and friends in the process, including one totally besotted Feminist Sexpert! Find Zane at Only Fans and Chaturbate under Zane Walker, and at Twitter, https://twitter.com/zanewalkerxxx.   

“Don’t be afraid to live your dreams, Ladies,” he tells us. “Don’t ponder it, do it. If it doesn’t work out, then it’s a life experience. If it does, it’s a dream come true.”

I’m the Feminist Sexpert, and I approve this message.

See and Support the 2023 San Francisco Porn Film Festival!

 

Those seeking the very finest in romantic, daring, sensual and richly artistic porn need look no further than the 2023 San Francisco Porn Film Festival, set to return with its grand celebration of sexual cinema August 16th-27th, with online programing and in-person events broadcasting live from the Brava Theater August 18th-19th, powered by streaming adult platform PinkLabel.TV.

The festival is what organizers describe as “a multi-generational celebration of the industry’s history, and a look forward to the innovations of today’s adult filmmakers.”

The Feminist Sexpert also classifies this primo naughty flick fest as a whole lot of fun; a collection of 69 titles presenting an erotic smorgasbord catering to every genre, audience and sexuality. The event will include in-person and virtual screenings, socials, filmmaker chats, and a vibrant selection of expertly made and thought-provoking (not to mention hot!) erotic and adult films.

This year’s festival features both new releases that push the genre and explore the full cinematic landscape of sexuality, along with classic LGBTQ movies–with an emphasis this year on group sex scenes. Love it!

The festival, appropriately enough, closes with BIG/BANG, a curation of who’s-who in contemporary porn-making around the world.

Other highlights include the Wednesday, August 16, FORE/PLAY feature, a special 24-hour selection of films screening on-demand, with films showcasing international filmmakers, including Auto/Visual and Jerks from Greece, NARCISSISM from Germany, and House of Woland from Australia, while Documenting a Hot Summer Weekend and The Dinner Party represent contemporary Bay Area porn producers.

On Thursday, August 17th, artists will come together at 11:00AM Pacific, streaming online from across the seas in the MEET/GREET filmmaker chat. Later that evening at 7:00PM, the festival’s opening film presents an early 2000’s San Francisco homegrown dyke porn, SUGAR HIGH GLITTER CITY.

Filmmakers Jack Strano and Shar Rednour from SIR Productions will be in conversation with scholar Lynn Comella. The landmark film is preceded by an excerpt from Shine Louise Houston’s 2000’s queer porn cult classic The Crash Pad. This program is a must-see for fans of dyke and queer porn!.

On Friday, August 18th, the festival gets physical with two action-packed shorts programs broadcasting live and in-person from the Brava Theater. FUCKING/FUN screens joyful and hardcore shorts at 4:00pm.

Local artists include HANKY director Ramses Rodstein and Transit co-creator Jiz Lee in attendance. Then at 7:00PM, the narrative and explicit porn program continues with SEX/SCENE. Local highlights include CrashPad Quickies: Knotty Rell and Zuri Love by CrashPad director Ava LaPrima and No Man Like Me by trans creator Jaq Quicksilver.

International artists include Australian Into-You-I-See-Me exploring interabled intimacy and the United Kingdom’s Pointe to Please displaying the artistic parallels of ballet and pole dancing. Saturday, August 19th has the festival back in the theater with ART/SMUT at 4:00PM presenting short films with an explicit and experimental focus.

Other festival highlights of particular interest to women include BIG/BANG, showcasing sex scenes by the biggest movers and shakers in the queer and ethical adult scene: Midnight Tryst by Forplay Films (Los Angeles), Beer and Loving with Las Bangers by HardWerk Pictures (Berlin), RITES OF SPRING by Four Chambers (London), Babygurl’s Big Birthday Bang by AORTA Films (New York) and CrashPad’s End of Year Special (San Francisco). Festival film and Q&A replays will be available online through Aug. 27.

“The global ensemble of films celebrates joyful sex, bodies, and represents the latest in contemporary adult filmmaking,” reads an event press kit.

The Feminist Sexpert agrees in full, and encourages all interested in promoting artistically and ethically produced porn to support this year’s festival by donating to the event’s annual fundraiser, offering VIP and pre-sale tickets, limited edition t-shirts, PinkLabel.TV gift cards, and big sponsorship packages.

“The fundraiser allows the international filmmaking community and its biggest fans to play a major role in supporting the event by helping to secure theatrical and virtual production expenses, and importantly, ensuring artist payment,” reads the event press kit. Contribute to the cause of really, really good porn here. The fund-raiser ends in a week, so let’s get to it Ladies!

For more insight about the 2023 San Francisco Porn Festival, the Feminist Sexpert once again had the pleasure of interviewing industry legend Jiz Lee, Marketing Director of the festival and of the groundbreaking PinkLabel.TV and Pink and White Productions.

1. Jiz, I am very pleased to help promote this year’s San Francisco Porn Film Festival, which in my opinion is one of the finest feminist, multicultural and queer film festivals in the world. Please let us know some of your favorite highlights from this year’s festival schedule!

Thank you for saying so, and for helping us get the word out! (Especially important, given how difficult it is to share sex-related information online these days.) The festival has so much to offer. There’s over 69 films!

Some highlights for me personally include the opening film Sugar High Glitter City, which was a film I saw prior to realizing that I could find a place in the adult industry. Big Sur Gay Porn is another highlight, a unique documentary about porn and gay culture by Ryan A. White, the director of Raw! Uncut! Video! which is another gay porn doc to check out.

As a lover of documentaries, and as someone who recognizes that porn should be valued, especially for its cultural relevance, porn documentaries might be my favorite subgenre of adult film.

Of course, explicit movies that arouse and celebrate sexuality are just as exciting, and this year’s submissions had a particularly fascinating trend: group sex! Maybe everyone emerged from the isolation of COVID wanting to make up for lost time. The festival ends with a ‘big bang’ featuring five films that focus on the multiplicity of pleasure. Interestingly, it also reflects porn makers from five global cities — London (FourChambers), New York (Aorta Films), Los Angeles (ForPlay Films), Berlin (HardWerk Pictures), and of course, San Francisco’s very own CrashPadSeries.com.

2. Tell us a bit about the history of this groundbreaking festival!

The festival was inspired by the PornFilmFestival Berlin, an epic film festival that has been running for over a decade. PinkLabel.TV’s director Shine Louise Houston has attended the Berlin festival for years, and recognized the important role it played for both audiences and artists.

There are so many important conversations that can come from watching adult films. I’m inspired by films that politically and creatively challenge the definitions of what “porn” can be. There’s also a sort of ‘porn-begets-porn’ snowball effect, where a filmmaker (and often an aspiring filmmaker!) sees something that sparks an idea or desire that then inspires them to create their own film, thus adding to the conversation.

In this way, an artist community grows around the presence of a festival and cultivates films that push the genre. We want to foster that kind of artistic growth here in San Francisco and so with Berlin’s enthusiastic permission, Shine launched an American version of the festival.

What is wonderfully unique about the San Francisco PornFilmFestival is how it was shaped by COVID. Creating a festival during a global pandemic made it one of the most accessible and community-supported events we’ve had the pleasure to organize.

Our festival launched in 2020, with planning well underway when the pandemic happened. The team pivoted to a virtual festival approach and fundraised to build our own broadcasting platform so that we could live-stream porn, which is restricted almost everywhere else. We shared our porn-friendly platform with other adult festivals who had lost access to theater venues. The show would go on!

As venues opened up, we added the in-person programs, but kept the entire festival online, making it accessible for those who cannot travel or otherwise join us in-person. The Brava Theater, our venue we’ve presented at for the past three years, is wheelchair accessible and all the films are subtitled or closed captioned.

We also want films screened to reflect ourselves and others in our community, so our curation considers inclusion and representation of disability, older ages, and body types, in addition to race, gender, sexuality, and kinks.

3. Tell us how important public support is to the staging of this year’s festival. What are the various ways in which people can get involved?

It could not happen without public support, beginning with the very first fundraiser in 2020 to build our broadcasting platform. We hold a festival fundraiser every year, because theater screenings mean additional costs but at the end of the day we want to ensure artists are paid, just as we must pay for the insurance and the staff.

As artists ourselves, we try to balance the realization that festivals are expensive to run but should acknowledge artists’ labor. After all, without the artists, there would be no festival!

We want YOU to get involved! It feels great to play a role in a festival and there are many ways to help that fit all income levels. You can help by simply spreading the word. Follow the festival online and share our posts.

You can purchase an online or in-person festival pass. You can donate more to get fun perks such as t-shirts and a giftcard to PinkLabel.TV. If you have the means, consider making a substantial contribution. We offer sponsorship packages that include name thank you’s, logo placements, and VIP swag bag goodies.

We’re especially looking for a few sex-positive companies, porn patrons, and festival angels to support our mission in a major way as Premier and Extravaganza Sponsors. Is this you or your company? Contact us!

4. In today’s challenging times, it seems to me that the San Francisco PornFilmFestival is a cinematic safe space where all adults of all genders and sexualities can feel welcome and entertained. Thank you so much — if you like, feel free to leave us with a message of welcome and invitation to this special event. 🙂

The best thing about porn is its ability to reflect our desires. Film itself is all about storytelling, whether it’s capturing history, giving voice to the underrepresented, or dreaming up utopias of new worlds.

We curate the festival to celebrate the kinds of films that inspire and challenge us, and reflect our own sexuality and exploration. It’s a respectful space that embraces a sex-positive perspective and an open-minded approach to new experiences. We welcome all adults to watch with us!

Long May She Rayne: Electra Rayne Brings Us Queer Crush

Photo supplied by Electra Rayne

As we celebrate Pride Month, we also give thanks for those film studios, publishing companies and other media entities that cater to the queer community–including a new adult film site that releases content by and for bi and lesbian women.

QueerCrush.com, a new lesbian studio run entirely by queer women, is the brainchild of Electra Rayne; a beautiful, talented longtime performer who aims to show the world how queer women and Sapphic nonbinary folks actually like to have sex–something of a rarity in an industry in which male content creators make stereotypical ‘girl/girl’ porn for an audience of manly men.

“As a bisexual woman in a relationship, I saw very little adult content made for me,” she said. “Also, I wanted to make porn that my girlfriend would like. She loved the idea of lesbian porn, but couldn’t find anything made for her.”

A joint venture between Vegas-based performers Rayne (owner/director) and Dahlia Von Knight (head of production), QueerCrush launched last year and has now produced more than fifty scenes–all of which present lovely vignettes of authentic, nonscripted, spontaneous lesbian sex.

“We feature real-life couples,” said Rayne, “as well as women who want to act out their fantasy crushes on performers they love.”

Rayne most literally gives these women ‘free Rayne’ to perform their scenes in the way that they choose, in accordance with their desires.

“We direct them to have sex in any way they choose. We don’t tell them how to do the scene,” she said. “In all of my time as a performer, I’ve never had a director ask me for advice on how to shoot an authentic lesbian scene.”

Rayne herself appears on the site, along with adult luminaries that include Alex Coal, Casey Calvert, Penelope Kay, Lotus Lain, Rebecca Vanguard, and Sinn Sage. Also appearing are models that one might not normally see on mainstream porn sites.

“We have a focus on diversity,” said Rayne. “We have women of different ages, colors, sizes, looks, identities, and physical abilities.”

Photo supplied by Electra Rayne

All Queer Crush content is produced ethically, with full consent, preliminary interviews and check-ins in place. Performers select everything from their makeup and wardrobe to what they want to do during their scenes.

“My ultimate goal is always to maintain a safe, comfortable and fun set,” said Rayne.

And it’s all geared toward the female gaze.

“Straight men aren’t likely to like our content,” said Rayne. “This is for queer women and nonbinary people.”

And how does Mrs. Electra feel?

“My partner loves it,” said Rayne. “She doesn’t even mind that we have a porn studio in the house.”

Luna Storm, a BBW performer who recently shot for the site, said of her experience with QueerCrush: “I love that we got to pick our own partners and that the connection was really authentic. We were able to just have a great time and explore each other. The entire experience was super chill and I can’t wait to work with QueerCrush again!”

“QueerCrush is queer porn at its absolute finest!” wrote veteran performer Casey Calvert, who also directs for Lust Cinema. “My experience working with them was incredible. Every step of the way I was encouraged to be myself and create content in a way that feels true and genuine to me and my sexuality. I can’t wait to work with them again!”

A QueerCrush scene has been selected for screening at the 2023 San Francisco Indie Porn Film Festival. The site has also earned sponsorships from Sliquid Lube and Peepshow Toys–patrons can use promo code “queercrush” on either company’s website for a discount, with a portion of their purchase price going to support the site. Right now during Pride Month, QueerCrush.com is offering new customers 20% off for life – locking in a permanent $19.99 pricing.

For more information about QueerCrush and to subscribe to the website or buy/rent individual scenes, visit QueerCrush.com. Interested performers can visit the site as well and click “Model For Us” for information about the application process.

Belle Soleil: The Feminist Sexpert Remembers Deborah Sundahl

As an author, filmmaker, magazine publisher and lecturer, Deborah Sundahl shone as a bright glowing light and a feminist pioneer in the erotic industry. 

Along with the fabulous Nan Kinney, who I had the honor of interviewing in 2021 when their films were showcased by my friends at PinkLabel.tv as a part of their superb Classic Dyke Porn showcase, Sundahl directed some original, one of a kind–not to mention totally hawt–erotic films made by and for lesbians. Released under the fantastic Fatale Media label, these sensual classics included the signature Suburban Dykes starring Nina Hartley and Sharon Mitchell, Safe is Desire (a vitally important adult sex education film that addresses the subject of safe sex), Hungry Hearts, a gorgeous girl/girl romance, and Burlezk One and Two (which chronicled the real life stage performances of the first lesbian strip troupe).

Sundahl and Kinney also were the co-founders of On Our Backs, the first porn magazine produced by and for lesbians. A sexual wonderland for the modern lesbian, OOB featured centerfolds, erotic fiction, articles, and ads for the XXX videos, audios, phone sex services, and strip shows geared toward women only.

As an author and lecturer, Sundahl wrote extensively on the subject of Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot–and also produced videos showing both women and men how to make their ladies feel real, real good.

Deborah Sundahl passed away June 13. Yet the mark that she and Kinney left on the world of women’s and lesbian pornography and sexual agency is eternal and indelible. Beyond joining the likes of Candida Royalle as shameless trailblazers who engaged on a quest to offer quality adult entertainment for women, they gave many bi and gay women the courage and permission to express and enact their identities and desires–proud and unashamed.

Thank you, dear Deborah. Rest in Power.

A GoFundMe has been established, to assist Deborah Sundahl’s family with hospice and funeral costs. Support the effort here.

The Feminist Sexpert Says: Vote No on Throat

Photo found at Pexels, taken by Andrea Piacquadio

In the future, when a woman’s crying like that, she isn’t having any fun!–Louise Sawyer, a title character in the film Thelma and Louise–a film deservedly listed in the Library of Congress National Film Registry.  

So last year commenced the 50th anniversary celebration for the film Deep Throat, a pornographic film credited with launching the ‘porno chic’ movement–a celebration in which the Feminist Sexpert did not take part, because she thinks the flick reeks. She wrote a column detailing the reasons behind her stance here

Ah, but she’s not done yet.

Now comes the news that, to cap off the big ol’ Throaty Party, a campaign called #VoteThroat has been launched–a campaign that promotes the inclusion of the film Deep Throat in the Library of Congress National Film Registry.

In this column, I would like to address and refute the reasoning presented behind this campaign.

1. The Throaty Committee claims that, despite a stated goal to list a full spectrum of films from all genres, the Library of Congress has yet to include an X-rated film in its heralded registry. This is incorrect. Midnight Cowboy, Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song and Medium Cool all were rated X at the time of their release, as was Pink Flamingos–and all four are now featured in the registry. In fact, a number of sexually provocative movies are featured in this esteemed listing, including the aforementioned Cowboy, She’s Gotta Have It, Sex, Lies and Videotape, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Harold and Maude, Son of the Sheik, Jezebel, Mom and Dad, and many others.

This year alone, Dee Rees’ fantastic Pariah joins a handful of LGBTQA films to make the list.

It may be true that no pornographic film is featured in the registry–but why start with Deep Throat? The Feminist Sexpert, for example, would love to see Candida Royalle’s Femme, a movie that single handedly revolutionized the couples market and marked the inception of feminist porn as a marketable industry, on the list. Another likely candidate would be The Devil in Miss Jones, though I personally am not a fan. Andy Warhol’s Blue Movie was the first explicit sex film to be released nationwide in the United States. Boys in the Sand was the inaugural gay porno to receive a wide release. And Andrew Blake’s beautiful Night Trips was the first XXX film to win a top award at a mainstream international film festival.

2. They listed When Harry Met Sally. Why not Deep Throat? Sure. When I think of When Harry Met Sally, a wise, sweet, gentle romantic comedy, I also think of a porno movie about a woman who discovers that her clitoris is located in her throat.

But yes, the Throat Throng believes that, because of its featured and famous orgasm scene (I’ll have what she’s having and all that), new registry inductee When Harry Met Sally is comparable to Deep Throat. Here’s the problem: in her faked orgasm scene, Meg Ryan’s character of Sally was demonstrating just how easy it is for a woman to fake a climax; something far too many women do every day. In Deep Throat, by contrast, the audience is supposed to believe that the heroine gets her proverbial jollies solely from the performance of oral sex. In other words, just be a good girl and fall to your knees to please your man–only in this way will you find true happiness.

3. Deep Devotees insist that Deep Throat is woman positive, sex positive and fun to watch. This is the saddest, and most grossly inaccurate assertion put forth by the Throaters; that Deep Throat is a light-hearted, fun-loving film that makes a positive statement about women’s sexuality. 

The movie’s star, Linda Lovelace, aka Linda Boreman, insisted for years that she was coerced into the making of the film Deep Throat–not by the film’s cast and crew, but by a manager husband who abused her for years.

Boreman’s story drew much support from legendary feminist Gloria Steinem, and credence from witnesses and the affirming results of several lie detector tests. 

If you look beyond the blank eyes and childlike smile that she displays in the film, you see the bruises on her body. And as Roger Ebert stated in his brilliant review of Deep Throat, “It is all very well and good for Linda Lovelace, the star of the movie, to advocate sexual freedom; but the energy she brings to her role is less awesome than discouraging. If you have to work this hard at sexual freedom, maybe it isn’t worth the effort.” 

And as far as being a peachy couples flick, well the immortal Ebert has an answer for that.
“The word just sort of got around: This is the first stag film to see with a date,” he wrote. “There were a lot of couples in the audience Sunday afternoon. Most of them, I thought, left the theater looking a little grim.”

Two points I will concede: Deep Throat exceeds 10 years in age. And it does indeed boast a female lead character–like the vast majority of porn flicks. Congrats on that.

The Feminist Sexpert herself never has attended a public showing of the film Deep Throat. She has, however, visited the film research room of the Library of Congress. When I was researching my book Ladies in Silver, a chronicle of women who worked behind the scenes in the silent film industry, I basked in the beauty and tradition of this hallowed hall–a place that people go to celebrate the very best in film.

Deep Throat has no place at the Library in Congress. Linda Boreman does have a place in history, but it was one for which she constantly had to fight.

During her appearance on the TV show Woman2Woman in 1984, Linda Boreman asked an adult theatre owner point blank, “Do you realize that whenever you show the film Deep Throat in your theater, that you’re showing me being raped?”

The woman said nothing for a moment before mumbling, “No, I don’t realize that at all.”

Then she looked away.  


Victimblaming a heroine? The Feminist Sexpert has something to say

Photo courtesy of Laker at Pexels

A real-life story of sheorism played itself out in my home community of Tampa Bay, Florida, recently, as a 24-year-old woman successfully fought off a rapist who tried to attack her as she exercised one evening between the walls of her apartment gym. This empowered young warrior woman fought valiantly for her life and bodily autonomy, running, punching, kicking and blocking until she exhausted her attacker and made her escape.

While many people rightfully lauded this woman for her bravery, quick thinking and her incredible show of strength, certain Internet commenters took it upon themselves to criticize the fact that she visited her apartment gym alone at night. And in one FOX News report, issues of ‘gym hookup culture’ was raised, with a mention made of women changing the way they dress when they visit the gym.

OK, that’s it. The Feminist Sexpert has had it. These people had better listen up, because I have some things to say.

It could be that this woman’s work schedule only allows for late night workouts, in a well lit gym at her apartment. It was likely because of these workouts that she successfully fought off her attacker. Where was apartment security? How did her attacker (who had previous offenses) get on the property? And why wasn’t the attacker in jail for his previous offenses?

I was once parked into my apartment parking space by an unbalanced neighbor in a car, waving at me and telling me that he felt a connection and we should get to know each other as he refused to move. I stayed locked in my vehicle, yelling and waving him out of my way until finally he moved. I then drove to my apartment office and reported his behavior.

This incident happened to me at 2 p.m. in the afternoon, and led me to wonder, Why was he allowed to move in to my apartment complex in the first place? Oh, and although I’d never met this individual, some people did question if perhaps he had read one of my erotic books and was simply reacting ‘like a horny male.’ Another said that, as a ‘pretty blonde woman,’ I was a target, and perhaps I should change my hair color. These are not the questions to be asking, and the target of an assault is not the individual who needs to be interrogated.

Also, in regards to any conversations regarding the way that women dress when they work out–sure, let’s all wear parkas and multiple layers to the gym, then end up passing out from heat exhaustion and overexertion. Men often work out completely shirtless, and somehow manage to successfully complete a workout without women sexually assaulting them. And yes, sometimes people do mutually, consensually flirt or plan dates as they exercise. This has nothing, and I mean NOTHING to do with assault.

Let’s say that a man visits an ATM machine late at night after leaving work, and valiantly fights off an attempted mugger. Would anyone blame him for being at that location at that late hour, or question his choice of apparel for the day?

This heroine deserves better than this paternalistic tripe. And women deserve better than a culture which tries to dictate the way that we dress, work, work out, and live.

Romance Your Lady: A Guide from the Feminist Sexpert

Image courtesy of Anna Shvets at Pexels

Many menfolk often complain that their ladies spend way too much time with their noses in romance books. Well, Dudes, the Feminist Sexpert has some news for ya! It’s not their noses you have to worry about–indeed, ladies tend to read romance novels in an effort to stimulate their hearts and lady parts. So if you’d prefer that she focus on you, and not the perpetually pouty and sublimely stacked male model on the cover of Pulsating Passions (Part Five), follow these helpful suggestions–coming straight from a published romance author celebrating a decade in the biz–woohoo!


1. Read her books yourself. And make them come to life. I know. Pulsating Passions (Part Five) does not occupy the top of your TBR List. Yet a look through the pages of her favorite romance books equals a look into her wildest fantasies. So if she favors a particular type of romance–and more specifically–a particular type of hero–then study and embody the fantasy. Does she favor bad boy billionaires? Put on your best suit and whisk her away for a weekend at a resort–one that comes complete with lavish meals, dancing, and prezzies–lotsa prezzies! Does she prefer bad boy bikers? Put on the pleathers and whisk her off for a ride on your engine (tasteless pun fully intended). Does she like rock stars? Dust off the karaoke machine and the tight pants. Does she like vampires, pirates or princes? Visit the costume and props store–dress up, set a scene in your bedroom, and invite her to live the dream.

2. Play dress up. OK, Dude–how many times has she donned that darned cheerleader uniform for your benefit? You’ll really make her cheer if you ditch the spaghetti-stained boxers and opt for a G-string, kilt, loincloth, or whatever strikes her fancy. Yep, I said loincloth.

3. Dance sexy. Ladies love a man who can dance. So whether you stage a sexy striptease for an audience of one, or sweep her across your back porch in a scintillating tango, you are sure to dance your way into her heart-and all those all-important other parts! If you need some pointers, take a class or two at a local dance studio, or check out flicks like Magic Mike, Dirty Dancing, and A Night in Heaven for guidance.

4. Spiff up your look. Let’s face it; so many women get up at ungodly hours so they can do their hair and makeup, dressing their best–both for their jobs and for their partners.  And so many men shower, shave, then say, “I’m good!” Um, nope–if you want your lady to look good for you, then repay the favor by getting a salon haircut and buying a few new suits. Hit the gym, maybe buy some skin lotions and cologne. It won’t kill ya, and she’ll love the results.

 5. Be more particular about porn. Unless you really want your lady to torch your DVD player and run from the room summoning her divorce lawyer on speed dial, do not show her any pornographic production involving baby-sitters, stepdaughters, hookers, or stepdaughter hookers who moonlight as baby-sitters. Opt instead for classy, romantic flicks that appeal to the desires of female viewers. Perhaps something from Sssh.Com, Blush Erotica, Lust Films, Afterglow, Bellessa House, Blue Artichoke, Foreplay Films, etc.

6. Ask her her fantasies. And make them come to life in your bedroom. Well, get to it! And tell her the Feminist Sexpert sent ya.

Feminist Sexpert Interview: Ms. Naughty

Award Winning Erotic Filmmaker: Ms. Naughty

A pioneer and top creator in the field of feminist pornography, Ms. Naughty is a winner of multiple Feminist Porn Awards and was named an Indie Porn Icon in 2017. This amazing lady is also, as I can attest, a fantastic promoter and supporter of other female creators in the business. Long renowned as a writer, critic and webmistress in the feminist adult industry, she is now the owner and director at the amazing Bright Desire films–a revolutionary indie/couples studio poised to celebrate a decade in the business.

The Feminist Sexpert is proud to profile a premiere Feminist Pornographer: Ms. Naughty!

 

Feminist Sexpert: First I would like to say, Bravo! I loved my visit to Bright Desire and loved all of the clips, with Tease and Linger ranking among my favorites. As with other films of yours that I’ve seen, the clips were sensual, poetic and not at all vulgar. I felt naughty but not dirty after watching. Is this the formula that you strive to achieve with every scene?


Ms. Naughty: I’ve always wanted to portray sex in a positive way. I find that a lot of porn has a really negative vibe to it. When you watch it, you’re left feeling uneasy or maybe “mentally turned off”. So I’ve made an effort to avoid that. I want to show people sharing intimacy, interacting in positive, joyful ways. In my films people don’t “do” sex to each other in a competitive or negative way, they *have* sex together. It’s about a shared experience. Even in situations with power play, there’s respect for everyone. Nobody has to be the loser in my films. I’m big on showing consent and communication before and during sex.

And it’s really important to show a less serious side – the laughter, the mistakes, the less-than-glamourous moments. Because that’s what sex is like. It’s supposed to be fun.

Tease, a Bright Desire film

Feminist Sexpert: You’ve worn so many hats in the adult industry–reviewer, webmistress, writer, filmmaker. What first drew you to the industry, and what inspired you to make your own adult films?

Ms. Naughty: I was originally writing articles for an Australian women’s porn magazine and found my way into the online industry in 2000. I’ve always been interested in sex from a feminist perspective and this has informed everything I’ve done over the last 21 years. I always wanted to show female pleasure and show a woman’s perspective of sexuality. This was almost non-existent when I started out. Over the years I’ve expanded my philosophy and learned from others which is why I’ve included a more diverse range of perspectives and people in my porn. But as a straight cis woman I’ve always been keen on making a space online for women like me. We’re still ignored or misunderstood by the industry.

When I started out, I was working with photos and erotic fiction. I started making my own films in 2009 because the internet had moved into video and it was time to move with it. Being in Australia meant it was a lot harder to get started in this area, otherwise I would have done it sooner. It was a steep learning curve for me. I took a weekend filmmaking course, got some tips from a friend in the industry and just went from there. I was very much making it up as I went along. It’s only ever been me and my husband doing the work. We’re very low-budget, very DIY. I’m pretty proud to have won so many awards, given that we’re not a major production company.

Linger, a Bright Desire film

Feminist Sexpert: I recently shared my column with you about the need for more beefcake porn for women–and in your films, you cast gorgeous, sensitive actors like Ryan James and Parker Marx. What criteria do you look for in your male stars, and do you strive to spotlight or highlight the male form in your scenes?

Ms. Naughty: It’s always tricky casting male performers because of the “penis problem”. You usually need guys who are able to be erect and comfortable in a room with other people and cameras. It’s not easy – and kudos to every guy who does it. Not every scene I’ve done has required it, of course, but it is something you have to be aware of. Beyond that, I like to work with male performers who are in tune with my feminist philosophy. I want to know they’re on board with what we’re doing. I’ve received thousands of emails from men who are just keen to turn up and fuck. But I need male performers who are more enlightened and open to ideas. It also helps if they can act… but there’s ways of setting up scenes where that’s not vital.

I’ve shot a lot of real-life couples and usually I make sure the female partner is totally on board and comfortable with the shoot before I go ahead. She calls the shots. So in those cases, I’m not choosing the male partner according to how they look. It’s all about the couple and their needs.

In terms of shooting, I like to give equal camera time to the male and female form. Too often porn will cut the guy’s head out of the frame and focus only on the woman. I won’t do that. I want to show the audience what he’s feeling as well. And when I’ve shot films that do focus on the male form, I take a holistic approach. It’s not just about his cock. It’s about his face, his muscles, the tiny movements of his toes, everything. I’ve shot male solo masturbation films with voiceovers because I want to both admire their body and also get an idea of who they are, even as we’re watching a very intimate moment.


Trinity, a Bright Desire film


Feminist Sexpert: From my interactions with you over the years, you are always one of the most approachable and helpful adult industry professionals, particularly in support of other women. And if anything, I would like to see more networking and support among female content creators and performers. What are your thoughts?

Ms. Naughty: When I started out in 2000 there was a group of female webmasters who were very supportive of newcomers and we all promoted each others’ sites. I was so very grateful for that and I’ve tried to pay it forward. I’ve always felt that we’re better off supporting each other, even though we may be commercially competing. The industry is still male dominated and still caters to men so it’s useful for women, nb and queer producers and performers to network and communicate. We can collectively make a bigger space for ourselves by helping each other out. And also, our perspectives are all different, we all have something new or interesting to offer. The more choices women producers and performers offer, the better it serves the audience.


Spider Woman, a Bright Desire Film


Feminist Sexpert: Bright Desire will celebrate its 10th anniversary next year. What does the future hold for this amazing studio?

Ms. Naughty: Covid has put a dampener on production for a lot of the adult industry and we haven’t been able to make new films for a while. I’m hoping to change that in the future, once we can reliably travel (although the vaccine rollout here in Australia is a disaster so who knows when that will be). In the meantime I’ve been featuring the work of other producers whose films fit with the vibe of Bright Desire. I’m also looking at taking amateur couples self-filmed submissions sometime in 2021. Everyone has an amazing camera in their pocket now and this means we can see many more perspectives and ideas and sexualities.

PS: Links are NSFW!


The Feminist Sexpert Interviews Holly Corbella – Parties By Bellas

Businesswoman Holly Corbella is a first-time nominee for the XBIZ Awards, featured in the category of Retail & distribution – home party company of the year for her amazing company PARTIES BY BELLAS. This fun, vivacious woman has turned Girls’ Nights In into an art–which makes her a prime candidate for a Feminist Sexpert Interviews profile!

FS: What first inspired you to get into the pleasure products industry?

HC: It was not something I ever thought about actually. I wanted to have some fun with my girlfriends so I hosted a girls night in. The party was a huge hit and the lady asked me if I wanted to join so I said sure I’m up for that challenge. It was an amazing 3 years working for passion parties then they unfortunately closed. I was devastated and so was my team. We had 7 days to decide to move over to the company that bought passion parties or cancel our consultant ids. As a team we decided to move over to the new company as we loved The little family we created. It was completely different, so many rules to learn and ways of doing things. Two weeks into the new company I was fired. I hosted a couples party which I was told later on was against the rules. I didn’t know at the time as this was a party I had previously booked. I was told when starting with the new company we had 30 days to complete previously booked partied and transition to the new company. I hosted a mini pity party for myself for about two or three days not being able to leave the house. Then people started to reach out and tell me to start my own business. This was never something I had previously thought of and well the rest is history.

FS: What inspired you to start your own company, and how do you go about it?

HC: My inspiration to start parties by Bellas was my customers, family and fiends. My support system is why parties by Bellas is in Business today. I am truly honored and grateful for all the amazing people in my life. I took my anger and all the sadness I had about losing my business with another company and decided to make a positive spin. I was going to start my own company the way that I wanted it to be!! I was under a one year noncompete so during that time I slowly put together my business. I took online business courses which was some thing that I’ve never done before. I was researching all types of adult products and all sorts of other companies. I just wanted to see what was out there and what was out there and what was missing. From that I started my little family a company that is consultant friendly.

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FS: The toy domain is one arena of the adult industry in which women hold great power. How do you feel this industry has inspired women?

HC: It feels great as a women to be taking control of my life and my sexuality. I think it takes a strong women to open a business let alone a sex related business. I absolutely love meeting other like minded women and helping them to grow their careers with me. This industry is a great career for women not just because let’s face it Sex is going no where so we never have to worry about that and if covid taught me anything I am an essential worker when everything is shut down lol. Also from my experience unlike any other field I have belonged to these women I have met in the “sex industry” are not ones to tip toe around things they express how they feel. They are having as much fun as I am so the positive vibes surround us. We all help each other to grow and it’s just a great industry to be a part of. We stick together.

FS: How do you feel the party format promotes toy sales? How do you feel that it promotes female bonding?

HC: I feel in-home adult parties is the best way for a woman to find an adult product that is perfect for her. She is able to see the item an how it works before purchasing it. It’s also in a comfortable atmosphere either by herself or surrounded by friends who might have some inside perspective to add to the conversation.Talking about sex is one of the hardest things for people to do. I’ve been told at my parties because I am so open and comfortable about this particular subject it makes partygoers feel comfortable talking about things that they’ve never felt comfortable talking about before. This then brings the women who are at the party together opening up about their most secret of thoughts. Now creating a bond only they will have with each other.

FS: I understand that you’ve been nominated for an XBiz Award? Tell me about it!

HC: Yes, I have been nominated for a XBIZ award! I am beyond excited about this as this will be the first time for me. I was nominated in the category for best in-home parties. I know everyone says that just being nominated is enough and it doesn’t matter if I win. Of course I want to win but this nomination for me made me have my “I made it” moment. I’m up against companies that have been around much longer than parties by Bellas and have many more consultants. Parties By Bellas is still very much seen as a small business as we are just under 30 STRONG.

FS: What are some of your favorite products that you offer, and what are your product categories?

HC: It’s really hard to pick just a few items. I do love our new Bellas kick ass self defense line. I feel it’s very important for a women to be able to feel dave and be able to protect herself. As for the adult line I’d have to say my favorite sex toys are on my website under hollys picks. Just too many to list.

Parties by Bella’s is not just a sex toy company. Yes we have a great selection of sex toys but we have an array of other items such as; self-defense Products, Bath and body items, CBD, Pet products, sexual enhancement items and much more.

FS: How can people learn more about your business? List all relevant websites, social media, etc.

HC: How to connect: I am also a sex life and business coach. I also own an event planning company.

Website: www.partiesbybellas.com
Email: [email protected]
Facebook: Holly’s Parties By Bellas
Facebook: Bellas wedding & event planning
Facebook: Bella Lady Boss Life & Business Coaching
IG: Parties By Bellas

Beauty and Power: The Feminist Sexpert Interviews Lily Craven

 

One of the favorite parts of the Feminist Sexpert’s job is profiling some of the most powerful and brightest women in the adult industry; and our latest guest most certainly fills that description. Beautiful Lily Craven is bringing back the glamour of the classic adult star, and also the power and grace. The Feminist Sexpert is proud to interview actress, radio show host and content creator Lily Craven!

FS: Although diverse in concept, your scene work seems to share one common link: Your characters, ranging from the mother-in-law to the policewoman, are always very strong and in charge. Is it important to you to reflect a strong image in your films?

LC: I have not always felt strong and in control. I realized, playing a character has its advantages. I can be whoever I want to be. I admire strong, self-confident women. So that is the role I began to play. Over time, I have grown into my character and become more like her. I’m not the woman I was when I started, that’s for sure. There is truth is the saying, “fake it until you make it.” I am an example that proves it really works.

In the industry, it was important for me to portray a strong, assertive woman on film. I felt a though it would be a barrier off sorts. I wanted it to tell others, don’t mess with me. It was my attempt at protecting myself.

FS: More and more in porn, we’re seeing beautiful women of all ages. How important is it to promote the MILF image in adult?

LC: It is especially important to keep the MILF image going strong because that’s what the fans and followers want. Let’s admit it. Everybody loves a MILF! I believe the MILF image symbolizes a woman’s accomplishments once they hit the stage in their lives when the children are grown, and the focus is no longer on the household.

The MILF begins exploring herself, including her sexuality. Quite often, a MILF has suppressed her sexuality to conform to society’s “mother” mold… I think promoting the MILF category is honoring that woman for her accomplishments and allowing her the freedom to be sexy and free spirited.

FS: As we discussed on your fab radio show, Phone Sex with Lily, you and I both had something to prove when we came into the industry. Please tell my readers the story of your introduction into the business!

LC: My story into the industry begins with a cheating spouse. When I was married, I felt as though I was the happiest, I had ever been in my life until I discovered it was all fake. Little did I know, the husband I adored, had been carrying on numerous affairs. When I discovered the infidelity, I was devastated. That devastation soon turned into anger. And then came the overwhelming urge to get revenge. I wanted justice. I wanted to stand up for myself. I considered fucking his friends or a family member, but then it would become all about me and the fact that “I did it too.” I realized he married me to make him look good on the outside. I was his trophy wife.

I decided to become his idea of the ultimate woman, which was a pornstar.

I enrolled in college and started selling content out of my inbox on Facebook to make ends meet. When I caught FB ban and could not sell for 90 days, a customer introduced me to webcam modeling on a site called Chaturbate. I did very well from the start.

At this point, my self-esteem and self-worth were at an all time low. My ex-husband managed to turn my family on me as well. Talk about a double whammy! Webcamming started building my confidence and the fans helped build back my self-worth. They told me I was beautiful and that I mattered. I don’t know how I would’ve done it without them. I am forever grateful. That is how I got started at 40 years old, in the adult industry. I would’ve never imagined my life going in the direction it has gone. Life is quite the adventure, isn’t it?

FS: I had so much fun as a guest on your radio show, Phone Sex with Lily. Tell my readers all about your new show!

LC: “Phone Sex with Lily Show” began after I was asked to stand in and host the K97FM Radio pornstar interviews. These interviews were extremely boring and dry to me. It was not my guests that made it boring but me who was not bringing anything unique or special to the table. I stepped back and thought, I need to create a visual for my listeners and what sells? Sex sells! Then it hit me. Phone Sex!

Currently, I interview talent in front of and behind the camera. I kick off each episode by having phone sex with my guest. As you can imagine, the industry has a lot of characters and personalities. Surprisingly, no one has tried to buck the system by not participating. It has been a lot of fun for my guests, the listeners, and myself.

FS: I know that we both have high standards when it comes to the treatment of women in porn. Are there certain things that you won’t do in scenes?

LC: When I first started, there was a list of things that I would not do. I was very vanilla and did not consider anything outside of the box. It has taken time, but I have performed beyond my expectations. The reason I have pushed my boundaries is not because of the pressure of the industry to do so. In fact, it’s the complete opposite. The reason I have pushed my boundaries is because the industry producers and talent have made me comfortable enough to do so. I have never been pressured on a set to perform anything that I was not comfortable with.

One boundaries that I have stuck to is, I will not allow myself to be humiliated on camera. I will not play the role of a submissive at that level.

FS: How do you think we can work to protect and represent women in the industry?

LC: I believe my contribution to women in the industry would be to educate the new talent coming in. Making them aware of the scammers and empowering them with the knowledge of who and where to turn if they have questions. I wish I had a “go to” person in the industry when I started. I could have avoided learning things the hard way. Most of us are self-taught. With that being said, we do a lot of trial and error. Established Talent, often, are willing to help a newbie. Please, reach out to me or someone in the industry. At minimal, we can point you in the right direction.

FS: You love to stay connected with your fans. List your chat and site links!

If you are looking for interaction with me while purchasing content or if you want to set up a live chat play date, I can be reached directly on https://Facebook.com/lily.craven40

If you prefer clip sites https://lilycraven.manyvids.com

For my faithful VIP followers https://LilyCravenxxx.com

If you want to see me perform on live webcam https://chaturbate.com/lily40

And last, please catch my new radio show “Phone Sex with Lily Show” every Wednesday 6pm PST, 7pm MST 8pm CST, 9pm EST, exclusively on https://K97FMRadio.com/phone-sex-with-lily

FS: Which are your more recent and favorite of your scenes?

LC: Most recently I traveled to Miami to shoot for BlushErotica.com. I was matched with a new young male talent named Milan. When he walked in the room, I thought to myself, somebody really loves me because Milan was Hubba Hubba Hot! It was an intense scene because we had great chemistry. Also, I stepped outside my norm and took on the submissive role a couple times and I loved it!

Then, Megan sends me an email to inform me she is the writer BlushErotica.com assigned to write the voice over for my scene with Milan. As you can imagine, I am thrilled! I know this is going to be incredibly sexy and steamy! I can hardly wait! That will be coming soon on BlushErotica.com .

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FS: It was an honor to write for this amazing lady–and to bring her here to you. Now listen to me on her fabulous show: Phone Sex with Meagan Hussey – Phone Sex With Lily Show | Podcast on Spotify