What Are The Biggest Relationship Deal Breakers?

A series of six studies published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin asked 5,541 single people what they thought were deal breakers when evaluating potential mates.

One of the studies asked specifically about deal breakers in short-term relationships versus long-term relationships. In long term relationships deal breakers were “anger issues” and feeling the other person is “untrustworthy.” Also sited as a turn-off in long-term potential mates was “when the other person is currently dating multiple partners,” which kind of ruins that “I feel special” feeling of a relationship, and makes people jealous — two reasons people site for not being able to to do the polyamory thing.

In short-term partners, deal breakers were “STD’s,” and “smells bad/has poor hygiene.” In the study called “What are the deal breakers?” being a slob was the #1 deal breaker. Here, in order of deal breaking importance is the dirty dozen of deal breakers, according to men and women:

Sloppy or unclean appearance
Men: 63 percent
Women: 71 percent

Men: 60 percent
Women: 72 percent

Too needy
Men: 57 percent
Women: 69 percent

No sense of humor
Men: 50 percent
Women: 58 percent

Lives more than 3 hours away
Men: 51 percent
Women: 47 percent

Bad sex
Men: 44 percent
Women: 50 percent

Lacks self-confidence
Men: 33 percent
Women: 47 percent

Too much TV/videogames
Men: 25 percent
Women: 41 percent

Low sex drive
Men: 39 percent
Women: 27 percent

Men: 32 percent
Women: 34 percent

Talks too much
Men: 26 percent
Women: 20 percent

Too quiet
Men: 11 percent
Women: 17 percent



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Anka Radakovich is a legendary Sex Columnist, Certified Sexologist, Sex Educator, Screenwriter, and Author of the book THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, PART 2, Tales from New York to Hollywood. THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, Part 2 is her third book. Her first two books, The Wild Girls Club; Tales from below the Belt, and Sexplorations; Journeys to the Erogenous Frontier were both published by Crown/Random House. She was the Sex Columnist for DETAILS Magazine for 9 years and currently writes columns for Brides.com and Los Angeles Magazine. Her writing has appeared in dozens of magazines including Marie Claire, Women’s Health, Men’s Health, Harper’s Bazaar, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Men's Journal, Seventeen, Glamour, and Maxim. She has appeared on numerous television shows including 8 appearances with Conan O’Brien. She was a Jeopardy question under the category “Men’s Mags.” As a Sex Educator and Sexologist, she is a college lecturer at Universities throughout the country who offers her unique brand of sex education. Follow her on Twitter @ankarad.


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