10 Tips For Better Sex In Time For Valentine’s Day

While you never really hear someone describe sex as bad, the reality is there’s sex that’s mind blowing and sex that is just average.  Even couples who once had great sex sometimes cool down in the bedroom for many different reasons.  How do you turn the heat up? Where do you start?

As a clinical hypnotherapist, I specialize in helping patients with relationship issues, and Valentine’s Day always seems to bring up questions about how to have great sex.

Here are ten tips that you can use with your lover:

1. Stop Focusing On Sex

When a physician rules out medical problems, it’s usually a lack of an emotional bond that is the problem. Engage in activities that build emotional entanglement.  Wild or scary activities like riding a rollercoaster together or skydiving work well for this.  When you experience an adrenaline rush or feelings of exhilaration together, it channels into other things including better sex. 

2. Slow Down

Never see sex as an obligation or something you have to do because people say it’s good for your relationship.  Take your time, make it last and enjoy it and each other. Work at going at a slower pace and savor the experience.  Remember to focus on foreplay because it stimulates both partners’ sexuality and increases emotional intimacy.

3. Be Honest With Your Partner

Be honest and tell each other what you like, what works and what doesn’t, new positions or techniques you want to try. This level of sexual awareness will take your emotional and sexual relationships to the next level. The secret to any long-lasting relationship is being comfortable and honest talking about the good and bad. If sex is the issue, make sure your partner knows.

4. Surprise Your Partner

A thriving sexual relationship means keeping it new and exciting. Don’t always do the same things you always do.  It shouldn’t be a routine.  Put on something your partner will be excited by. Role play or playout his favorite fantasy.  Try that thing she’s wanted to try but you have been holding back.

5. Get Out Of The Bedroom

Sex isn’t just for the bedroom. Find other places in your house/apartment to have sex. How about the car or the backyard?  Maybe the kitchen counter? Or next to the fireplace in the study?  Get creative and try different places.  Remember to vary the time of day you have sex, too.

6. Take Care Of The Other Stuff

While sex is always great at the beginning of any relationship, factors like stress, money, work and children start taking priority in people’s lives. Manage your life effectively so you can truly enjoy that special alone time you have with your partner.  The idea is that when you’re spending time with your partner, the other things shouldn’t be a factor.

7. Focus On The Positive Attributes Of Each Other

Human nature pushes us towards negativity. This is a sexual killer because when you’re focused on what you dislike about your partner, feelings of resentment accumulate and emotional connection fades.  Remember, we’re all human and no one is perfect.  Focus on the positive in each other and focus on lifting each other up all the time.  Your sexual experiences will thank you.

8. Imagine It Ahead Of Time

Spend five to 10 minutes a day picturing yourself having great sex with your partner. Think about the sounds, sights, smells and how you feel during sex. Many people focus on the physical aspects of sex and ignore the fact that sex can be a mentally and emotionally stimulating experience. The more you prepare mentally, the more amazing the physical becomes.

9. Use Technology To Your Advantage

Technology is everywhere, so use it to add some fire to your love life. Send your partner a sexy text or email while they’re at work. But remember, sometimes you have to put the technology down. In today’s world, picking up the phone and calling or spending time in person can create a better emotional connection and better intimacy as well.

10. Hit the right spots

Have your partner lie down on his or her stomach naked. Start massaging from the feet and work up to his or her head with massage oil, or better yet, massage glide that doubles as a safe sexual lubricant. A relaxed body allows for better blood flow to the extremities which can lead to a stronger erection for men and increased sensations for women. Try some sexy erotic talk to heighten the mood.

Colin Christopher is the author of Manipulate The Date.

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Colin Christopher is author of the book Success Through Manipulation: Subconscious Reactions That Will Make or Break You, and his 2016 new release, Manipulate The Date. Over the past 14 years, he has shared stages with world-class speakers like Bob Proctor, Steve Siebold and Brian Tracy. Some of his clients include McDonalds, Bell Mobility and Princess Cruise Lines. Colin is a clinical hypnotherapist and hypnosis instructor certified by the American Council of Hypnotist Examiners and holds Bachelor’s degrees in genetics and chemistry. In his professional practice, he helps his patients with weight loss, smoking cessation, improving confidence, overcoming fears and phobias, and more. He has a special interest in helping singles build the self-confidence to have better dates, and works with couples to improve their relationships. Colin helps companies manage change to improve performance using Success Through Manipulation training. He also teaches people how to become stage hypnotists and travels the world performing fun, entertaining stage hypnosis shows. Colin began his path of Hypnosis in his early teens, during his training as a competitive athlete. His coaches used hypnosis in a rudimentary form to help him visualize, focus and improve his performance. However, because of a childhood accident causing a chronic repetitive injury, Colin’s competitive career was tragically cut short. For years after, Colin searched for ways to come to terms with his chronic injury and heal himself. The doctors told Colin that he would suffer and have constant pain, most likely for the rest of his life. The answer was in front of him all along: Hypnosis Through his research, Colin realized that Hypnosis could do more than help him improve his athletic performance. Colin was able to master his injury and chronic pain with Hypnosis.

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