If you ultimately decide that he is worth the second chance then you need to consider a few things before re-investing your life into this relationship.
How Were They Caught?
I’ve learned that one of the most important indicators of whether a person will cheat again or not is how they got caught in the first place.
Did they feel guilty and confess? And if so, were you completely blindsided by the info or did you have suspicions about it?
Did you have to snoop and find out on your own because of suspicions you may have had?
Or did their lover contact you?
Who do they blame? Is it you or themselves?
Are they taking the necessary steps to figure out why they cheated and how they can prevent it from happening again?
Are they apologizing for their actions over and over again, and making changes to their social life until you feel secure?
Is going to therapy an option?
I couldn’t recommend this more! If you want your relationship to have a fighting chance, you are going to need a professional’s help.
Are they a repeat offender as a cheating felon? If this is not the first time they have done this to you, then it is definitely time to move the hell on. They are not ready for a relationship and you should stop wasting your time on someone who is not reciprocating your love and commitment.
Was the cheating a one-time thing or was it an affair that involved emotions? Emotions make things messier.
Is the person they cheated with single or also in a relationship?
Was it with a stranger or with a friend you know? Was it a co-worker, someone they will still be forced to see even when (and if) the affair ends?
Was your sex life dead before the cheating happened? (Not that it excuses anything…)
Is the intimacy (not purely sexual) also gone?
There are so many nuances in relationships that play a huge factor in predicting the future of your relationship and if your gut is telling you to give it up, then you have to.
You know your partner and relationship more than anyone else, so trust yourself.
Love shouldn’t be this complicated.
This article appeared on LoveCoachAdvice.com