He Secretly Dresses Up In Women’s Clothing, But He’s Not Gay

Some men like to wear pretty things, women’s things, not because they are gay or want to be a woman but it is a sexual turn on for them.

It is a turn on to be in women’s clothing, they love women so much that they want to feel what it is like to be dressed as one.

Cross-dressing, gender confusion, homosexuality, heterosexuality, likes the feel of woman’s clothing, a fetish how does one put a label on this?

There is a population of men that like to wear women’s panties, bra’s, and even clothing but they are very much attracted to women, so much so that they love to feel what it is like to be a woman or be closer to a woman. Unlike cross-dressing the turn on for them is that the woman is turned on by him wearing the panties, bra or lingerie. He may also like her to tell him what to do or treat him as her pet, ask him to serve her while dressed in the feminine clothing.

For many men that wear women’s clothing or are turned on by it, the unfortunate part about it is some men find themselves confused about their sexuality. They may wonder if they are gay, or perhaps have a gender issue…..

As a clinical sexologist in my private practice working with men has given me a better understanding of how to help them. Each man has his own unique idea of why it turns him on and to the extent that he dresses up or wears women’s clothing. Many times an incident may have happened while going through puberty that will set the “fetish” in motion. Some similarities do occur in many of the men that have spoken to me about their past and growing up. Most of the men reported to me that they were surrounded by females, sisters, cousins, aunts and strong mother figures, where dad may not have been around that often or not at all. The sisters and even mother may have dressed up the boy once in a while or play dress up and tease him (but that is not the defining factor). He also may have watched from the side lines as his sister, mother, aunt got ready for dates dressing up. How they were excited about changing outfits, the bright colors, sexy lingerie, makeup and getting ready.


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Dawn Michael has a diverse background as well as education in various fields. As an undergraduate in speech communications, Dawn competed nationally on the speech and debate team for three years as well as coached college debate for one year. The art of communication is an important aspect of any profession, especially one that involves helping others to communicate more effectively. Dr. Michael then earned her M. A. Degree in Marriage Family Counseling while working at her family business as an interior designer, and licensed contractor. Dawn did her internship at a psychiatric hospital, a drug diversion counselor, and marriage counselor completing her 3000 clinical hours. Utilizing her communications background, and marriage counseling background, she developed couples interior design teaching classes and workshops for 10 years. She published several hundred articles in magazines, websites and became the L.A. Love and Marriage Examiner where she continues to write articles today. As her audience grew, it became clear to her that many couples had issues with intimacy. Dawn went back to college and earned her PhD in Human Sexuality from The Institute for Advanced Studies in Human Sexuality and a certified member of ACS. Dr. Michael continues to work with couples and individuals in private practice, as well as continuing her interest in teaching, writing, lecturing and developing systems in the field of sexuality, psychology, communications and relationships.


  1. This article is gold in a coal mine. The link ‘read more here’ for the remaining isn’t working. I wish I could read the entire article. This article should be republished and many young people will benefit and share. Thank you.

  2. This article is greatly appreciated. I battled this issue all my life and I hear that 10% of all men have this issue and keep it in hiding, even before their wives and girlfriends. I am VERY interested in the psychological and spiritual aspects of this, but unfortunately, until now in 2022 there is not much research done around this. I hear many young men decide to go through gender correction surgeries and unfortunately, some of them regret this step at a later point in their lives. What other links for articles, psychological and peer reviews are there about this important subject?

  3. I’m a female going through this with my boyfriend. It’s hard on me because I have very low self esteem already and when I tried to dress sexy for him he wouldn’t even look at me or pay any attention to the fact I was trying to be sexy for him. It hurt me so deep that I struggle to wear such things around him. Secretly I wonder if he’s thinking he would look better in the outfit or that I look hideous. I even tried to understand and get into it with him but he didn’t really want that. He would rather hide it maybe thinking I wasn’t being truthful and didn’t really enjoy it or he’s ashamed. Idk but it’s a huge issue with us and I just wish I could understand it better because I do love him and want to be with him and I’m so confused if he even feels the same! He’s not gay he’s obsessed with women just not me I feel. I don’t know what to do to ‘fix’ this relationship but I’m on the verge of leaving because of how I feel and I don’t even know if he would care but he says he would. He’s lied all his life about this so he’s a good liar so is he lying about being hurt if I leave? Ugggggh he doesn’t want to talk about it ever so what do I do….just leave?


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