This has to be the best map ever. Some of the town names are fantastic, like “Sugar Bunker, Nevada,” which will now be added to my vocabulary list of things to call my vagina.
The map was created for fun by the folks at Estately.com, in Seattle, Washington, a popular real estate site with listings across the country. They curated the most sexually sounding towns in America including “Butternuts, New York” and “Dick, Michigan,” no doubt the home of endless dick jokes.
Once I looked at this map I was not able to stop using the lewd town names in a sentence, such as “Hey “Butternuts,” why don’t you travel down to “Mary’s Igloo” with your “Brohard”, and “Bigbone” your way to “Beaver City”? Or “Hey, ya wanna go to “Rambone” with your “Bonesteel” in my “Keister”? It’s just endless.
SUGAR TIT, SOUTH CAROLINA
Although most of the names are awesome, there is one in there that sounds politically incorrect at worst, porno at best: “Sugar Tit”, South Carolina. What is the story behind that? According to the Greenville News , the area was settled by Scots-Irish. The town consisted of farms and sugar plantations. According to a local, “they were all really hard workers and all farmers. They needed women in the fields. They would take their babies in the fields with their blankets. They’d put put sugar cane in the blanket, dip it in water, and that would help keep those babies in the field while Mom would work. They called it a sugar tit. It’s like the first pacifier.”
Years later, the Harrison’s store “at the highway junction”, drew local men to hang out most evenings, and they hung out there so long their wives would say “Go up to old Harrison’s. He must have a sugar tit up there.”
Ballplay was named because Native Americans “would play stickball at the site to resolve differences between tribes.” Little did the town know that years later the name of the town would refer to playing with someone’s balls.
Intercourse, Pennsylvania (population 1,274) sits in the middle of Amish Country and is a tourist destination. The movie Witness was filmed there. Located in Lancaster County, it was named in 1814. Two theories exist: the first was that it was named for the “Cross Keys” highway that intersected between Philadelphia and Pittsburgh. The second was that the word “intercourse” was commonly used by the Amish to describe “religious fellowship” or “social interaction”, like when the Amish wanted to party. The town’s sign is frequently stolen.