So, you have performed oral, rode them crazy, and handled the penis like a stick shift. What else is there to do…to do…to do? Much! Adding some fresh and new techniques can spruce up what you have tried and tested before. The body has so many erotic points to be explored.
These zones are referred to as the erogenous zones and are areas on the body that cause arousal and extend, expand, and enlighten additional methods to orgasm. From the sides and back of the neck, armpits, chest, inner arms, and thighs, a tickle, a stroke or a lick causes the sensory anticipation to create a sexual response. While everyone may not enjoy this; often for them, it may tickle, hurt, or simply turn them off, the masses enjoy much pleasure from stimuli to these areas.
A mutual attraction does not necessarily exist to fully deliver pleasure either. In some cases, you do not even need to have met the person. This just happened to me when I got to meet Lorenzo4016 at the ASN Lifestyle Magazine Awards this year. I was forward facing and over my left shoulder, the deepest sound vibrated straight through me. I do not even remember exactly what he said but the bass and pace of the words made me jump as butterflies ran through me. Similarly, objects and images can stimulate the erogenous zones. Universally, it is upon touch in many areas of the body that can bring magnificent pleasure.
The response to pleasure is different in areas that have hair than in non-hair spaces. The hair on the body grows due to testosterone and the surface is known as epithelium. There are several different representations of these surfaces. Where there is less hair, it is reported to have more sensitivity. This is because bare areas like the inner arm, the back of the knees, or the underside of the toes can give us butterflies when touched. You can blindfold or use lube, feathers, lotion, or textures of any sort for any action you do on the body. Be mindful that anticipation is the goal of adding a sense of arousal. Anticipation is excitement, waiting eagerly for something you know is going to happen builds energy behind their pleasure.
Tip: Be prepared for any reaction and follow the lead of the person as you experiment.
This is not a tangible thing you can touch; you can definitely still stimulate this part of them. Let them have some time to consider your touch before your fingers arrive on their skin. The ultimate tease. Whisper in their ear softly and tell them all the things you are going to do to them without touching a hair on their body. Just pretend like you are sexting and say those things to them in real life.
ABDOMEN AND NAVEL
Many people find stimulation (kissing, biting, scratching, tickling, caressing) the abdomen to be pleasurable, especially close to the pubic region. It can cause strong arousal in individuals, in some even stronger than stimulation of the genitals. The navel is one of the many erogenous zones that has heightened sensitivity. The navel and the region below when touched by the finger or the tip of the tongue result in the production of erotic sensations.
Known as the sacrum, the base of the spine is an erotic spot to lick, suck and massage for arousal. Follow its path with the pads of your fingers and with the tips of them. Both are different sensations that can give two types of pleasure.
The tips of their fingers have many nerves and respond to even the lightest of touches. Human fingertips are the second-most sensitive parts of the body, after the tongue. Placing your finger or fingers into their mouth and massage the inner jaws, tongue, roof without reaching too far back to cause them to gag of course. Allow them to suck on your fingers and moan as they do to increase stimulation with touch, sound, and visual enticement. Brush your tongue along the fingertips. Pull their fingers into your mouth much as you would a penis. Use saliva to create a wetness while rolling your tongue over and around the fingers.
The erogenous zone of the armpits is a very individualized sensitivity experience. Because of its normal-haired dense texture, the nerve sensitivity is different for everyone. However, if you use intense and suspenseful touches and strokes, you should elicit some arousal. Don’t go too light as to tickle them. If using your mouth, you should be prepared to apply pressure based on the amount of hair that is there. Be sure your mate is clean unless your fetish is the musk of the area. Apply lots of pressure first and soften the touch based on their response.
The softer skin of the inner arm and the crease, which is the mid-arm bend are very sensitive to hand, feet or mouth manipulation. Vigorous kneading and light kiss can induce erection and/or ejaculation without touching the penis. Where the arm bends is sensitive due to the lack of hair in the area. Obese people may have less sensitivity and folks with thinner skin may find the touches painful or uncomfortable at least.
There are nerve endings on their scalp that are attached to the rest of their body, and when their hair is gently pulled when they are kissed or held, it sends stimulation to the rest of their body. While kissing, try running the tips of your fingers through the hair, over their scalp gently, then a bit harder with a tug. If they react with small sounds and pleasure moans, pull harder, then let go before they want you to. This playful tease with drive them legit crazy.
THE FEET IN GENERAL
Because of the concentration of nerve endings in the sole and digits of the human foot, and possibly due to the proximity between the area of the brain dealing with tactile sensations from the feet and the area dealing with sensations from the genitals, the sensations produced by both the licking of the feet and sucking of toes can be pleasurable to some people. Similarly, massaging the sole of the foot can produce similar stimulation. Many people are extremely ticklish in the foot area, especially on the soles. There’s a reason why reflexology massages are so popular. Be gentle and with adding pressure can be erotic for some. You can apply pressure from your tongue or fingertips to give a massage that advances with their response. Start by using some massage oil and massaging the feet, especially the arch of the foot.
Shrimpin’ anyone? Yes, this is what it’s called when you suck on your partner’s toes. This is so erotic because feet are a nonconventional hotbed of sensation just waiting for some stimulation. During sexy foreplay, move your kisses teasingly down their body until you’re all the way down to their feet. Suck on your partner’s toes—or even lick the bottom of their foot arch.
They are going to be extra sensitive here. Striking their butt cheek, even lightly, tends to stimulate the whole area. Think of it like a slow vibration flowing through their insides. If your mate is open to a little spank play, this is great to do while they are on top of you in any variation of missionary. Squeeze their booty when they are hitting just the right spot, Give them a quick spank if you’re both into it. A great act to try is surfing, a baby oil butt ride. Simple and erotic. Oil or other wet substances in the sex act is a fetish. Most call it sloshing. Place towels or additional sheets on the bed/surface and generously pour baby oil on your entire front and their entire body. Use your body to massage theirs, rub, apply pressure, stroke and knead their body to orgasm. Be aware of the oil ingredients BEFORE using your mouth.
The small groove above the lips have long been considered an erogenous zone. Philtrum, translates from the Latin word for “love potion.” To stimulate the philtrum, plant a very soft kiss on this area, right before running your tongue down the groove to meet their upper lip.
Since the inner thigh is so close to the genitals, even without the sensation of touch, just being in that area is sure to get them anticipating what’s next. Take your time to kiss and lick their inner thigh before going to touch the genitals when performing oral. Tease them and experiment with your lips. You can go from light fluttering kisses to harder sucking. It may tickle or it may feel like butterflies in the belly. Use long strokes from knee to groin. DO NOT touch the genitals, including the anus. Be sure to stay focused on inner skin with a soft tongue and the rest of the legs with a little more pressure.
The lips in general are one of the most sensitive parts of the body. Take your time while kissing. There’s a reason why nibbling and variation in pressure can drive you over the edge when done correctly. Gentle and with added pressure can be erotic for some. You can apply pressure from your tongue or fingertips to give a massage that advances with their response. Nibbling their bottom lips and possibly even going for a harder bite. The sensations of going from a tender kiss to some teeth will surprise your mate and excite the brain.
THE OUTSIDE OF THE LOWER LIP
The area between the lower lip and the chin is an erogenous zone for most. It is packed with extra sensitive nerve receptors. Suck their lower lip into your mouth the next time you’re making out and use the tip of your tongue to stroke this under-lip area. That motion stimulates the whole erogenous zone in a teasing way, which will put them on the erotic edge. Keeping the lower lip inside yours magnifies the sensation. It’ll feel as if electric currents are shooting from your lips straight to your genitals.
The V-zone is a hot bed of pleasure for your partner, not only is it a turn-on that they have front-row tickets to watch you stimulate them, but it’s an easy pit stop to make on the way to downtown. Have them lay on their back while you straddle them and give them what they really want. Starting from their belly button, use your fingers and nails to trace a line down from the happy trail stopping before you hit total genitals. Then retrace your steps but use your tongue to trace a V shape from their hips to right above the genitals. Draw it out and really tease them until they can’t take it any longer.
The Adam’s apple is an erogenous zone, thought behind this stems from how the thyroid (just below the Adam’s apple) is closely linked to the sex organs. The clavicle area and the back of the neck have sensitive nerve endings that can be stroked or licked to arousal. Suck, (hickey?) kiss and squeeze the neck. Have them lie on their back and literally just suck the Adam’s apple. Keep your tongue flat and light, not too much pressure! For all individuals, you can massage the area with wide circular motions to ensure you’re hitting that T-spot of the thyroid.
THE DIP UNDER THE BACK OF THE ANKLE
This is the spot that may get bruised when you wear new shoes. There is a fingertip-sized pressure point that holds enormous passion potential. This spot is linked to the sex organs and pressing it releases energy, producing feelings of pleasure. While in reverse cowgirl, grab their feet and pulse each pressure point in rhythm with your thrusts. Try this right before they are about to climax to really blow their mind.
You may know the feeling you get from someone whispering in your ear. Playing with the earlobes can be very sensual and send shivers down the spine. Kiss your partner across their shoulder, up the neck, and stop right before you hit the ear. Do this to both sides. When they are right about to lose it, start kissing the earlobe, and use your tongue to bring the earlobe into your mouth. Play around with gentle nibbles, tongue, etc. Be careful not to touch any other part of their body while doing this and see how wild they get from you just touching the earlobes. A wonderful place to caress, kiss, lick, bite or suck.
The body is a true wonderland of pleasure. There are so many places to stimulate that intimacy should never be boring. If you find yourself in a rut, pick up a copy of Climax: The Power of Great Sex and start to give or ask for some whole-body stimulation.
Debra Shade, ACS
Board Certified Clinical Sexologist and Master Sexpert