Is Sex Really A Selling Point?

There is a preconceived notion that many people have about specific sectors of the adult industry.  For brick and mortars, they constantly contend with the stereotypical idea that the stores are seedy with sticky floors and men walking around in trench coats – not a place for women, the home pleasure parties peddle sex toys, pornography and catering to over-sexed women with unusual desires.   Fortunately, these stereotypes and antiquated perceptions have been dispelled and are continually being eliminated through the creation of beautifully decorated storefronts that promise a sex positive/female positive shopping experience once you enter those doors.

The same holds true for the home pleasure party sector.  Our particular sector has been around for decades, going into women’s homes all over the world, bringing products and promises of better sexual experiences.  Consultants have a specific mission: to book parties – to get into women’s homes and talk about sex and sell products.  Because we have to literally get our feet into our customer’s doors, the pitch of the home party professional has to be a little different than that of the brick and mortar owner, who only has to unlock the door and turn on the “Open” sign to get customers.  Or the internet outlet that utilizes social media to gain business.

So, the question that comes to mind is: Is sex a selling point?

From the invitations to the choices of products to the presentations, displays and games, the home pleasure party has essentially taken the “X” out of sex when it comes to presenting sex toys in customer homes.  This evolution occurred out of necessity – the necessity to book parties – to get in the door.  Our sector learned to soften the message and delivery to make buying sex toys more palatable and justifiable.

The current popularity of the phrase “sexual health and well-being” is one that actually put a phrase to an action that was already happening in the home party sector – we just hadn’t attached a catch phrase to what we were doing.  In any product presentation at a home pleasure party, you’ll hear words, phrases and product descriptions that promote intimacy; encourage more intense orgasms.  You’ll hear presentations that encourage fun couple’s play, self-love and exploration, vaginal health, prostate health.  What you won’t here are those words that are perceived to be on the dirtier side of the sexual spectrum.  Home pleasure party plan consultants encourage and support sexual prowess not sexual predator.

This method wasn’t created because the home party professional thought she was a notch above any other sectors – no.  This method was created in order to get bookings – to make a living selling sex toys to women who needed to be provided with justification for bringing a woman selling sex toys into their homes.  The home party professional had to convince the hostess that she was a trailblazer – ahead of her time – she was bringing her friends into the brave new world of sexual exploration! And still although on a different plane, the home party professional is still convincing her customers that they are goddesses – but sexual health and well-being goddesses now instead of trailblazers.

The home party sector leans toward a softer sell, encouraging conversations about discovering one’s pleasure centers and their boundaries and encouraging play and sharing with a partner (most likely monogamous couples)…but no judgement, it’s all beautiful.  This isn’t a judgement about the home party plan sector or any other sector of the adult industry, just an observation of how the marketing for this particular customer base is slightly different than that of any other sector.

In the home pleasure party sector, 96% of purchases are made by women. One major reason for this is because many home pleasure party plan companies only offer all female parties.  This not only encourages women to be more open about their sexuality it diffuses/takes the edge off the idea of discussing/imagining the sexual tension which intercourse involves.  Focusing on the sexual wellness aspect also ‘gives permission’ to home party goers to feel okay about their individual sexual needs and helps them recognize the need to enhance their sexual activities with their partners thus making purchases that will make the outcome of those experiences more meaningful to advancing the relationship.

For the home pleasure party sector and other sectors of the industry, selling sexual health may make our jobs easier and perhaps even more profitable.  You’re not only providing a product, you’re providing a service.  So think about steps you can take to remove the ‘X’ from ‘sex’ and party on!

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Tamara Bell holds a BS in Business Management. She is the founder of the Home Pleasure Party Plan Association, LLC., where she helps party plan business owners grow their business. She is the owner of a Love Coaching practice in Yuma, AZ, where she has been educating women and couples on ways to enhance their relationship for over 28 years. She has participated as a V-Day vendor for 10 years, helping colleges raise money for various non-profit organizations. Tamara has presented at the University of Pacific in Stockton’s Women’s Conference for the past 8 years educating students, educators and faculty on various issues relating to sex, romance and relationships. Her understanding of love and romance has enabled her marriage to reach its 34-year mark. She is also a Death Doula, after loosing her husband she wanted to help others dealing with a loss. Tamara is available for public speaking, media, product endorsements, and one on one private sessions. For a private session with Tamara the options are in person, phone, Skype, or email.


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