6 Out 10 People Say First Time Sex With Someone New Sorta Sucks

A survey of 2,000 people conducted by Pure Romance — a company known for in-home sensual party products, found that 6 out of 10 people said that first time sex was awkward, disappointing, or just plain “bad.” Congrats to the other 40% who really enjoyed themselves!

For both men and women “bad sex” meant no orgasm, with women reporting no big O 57% of the time and men 41%. Both men and women complained about first time sex happening so fast that it was over before it even started. And no foreplay, what happened to that? About a third of men and women complained that they went downtown on the other person and their (selfish) new lover didn’t reciprocate! (Just have to point to “it” I say.)

One thing men thought made first-time sex suck was whiskey dick, while the ladies were grossed out by “dirty sheets”, something the whiskey dick dudes were too drunk to notice.

The survey asked men and women what they worried about before, during, and after sex, and what they thought made for “bad sex.” Men worried most about pleasing their partner, lasting more than two minutes, giving their partner an orgasm, whether their body would turn off the other person, and whether they would get an STD.

Women worried most about whether their body was sexy enough, whether they would please their partner, whether they would get an STD, whether they would be perceived as being adventurous enough, and whether they would feel anxious trying out new positions.

While all of these concerns are totally legitimate, once you’re actually in the middle of doing it with someone new, you have to think “relax, its just sex” — and stop sucking in your stomach so hard you can’t breath.

It’s interesting to see that men are just as worried about whether their naked body will make their new partner call the whole thing off just as much as women were.

The good news here is that both men and women were willing to try it again, at an average of 4.5 times. So for everyone who didn’t get an orgasm the first time, fifth time is the charm.

The 5 First-Time Sex Things Men Worry About 

Will I please my partner?: 55 percent
Will I last long enough?: 47 percent
Will my partner have an orgasm?: 40 percent
Does my body look okay?: 31 percent
Will I get an STD?: 29 percent

Top 5 First-Time Sex Things Women Worry About

Will my body turn him on?: 65 percent
Will I please my partner?: 45 percent
Will I get an STD?: 35 percent
Will he think I’m not being adventurous enough?: 26 percent
Will he want to experiment with different positions?: 22 percent

Top 5 Things Men Think Means Bad Sex

I didn’t have an orgasm: 41 percent
There was no foreplay: 36 percent
Partner wants guy to go downtown on them but won’t reciprocate: 29 percent
It happened too fast: 29 percent
Whiskey dick: 29 percent

Top 5 Things Women Think Makes For Bad First-Time Sex

No foreplay: 57 percent
Everything happened way too fast: 44 percent
He had an orgasm, but I didn’t: 44 percent
Two words: Dirty sheets: 37 percent
He wanted me to go down on him but wouldn’t reciprocate: 33 percent

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Anka Radakovich is a legendary Sex Columnist, Certified Sexologist, Sex Educator, Screenwriter, and Author of the book THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, PART 2, Tales from New York to Hollywood. THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, Part 2 is her third book. Her first two books, The Wild Girls Club; Tales from below the Belt, and Sexplorations; Journeys to the Erogenous Frontier were both published by Crown/Random House. She was the Sex Columnist for DETAILS Magazine for 9 years and currently writes columns for Brides.com and Los Angeles Magazine. Her writing has appeared in dozens of magazines including Marie Claire, Women’s Health, Men’s Health, Harper’s Bazaar, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Men's Journal, Seventeen, Glamour, and Maxim. She has appeared on numerous television shows including 8 appearances with Conan O’Brien. She was a Jeopardy question under the category “Men’s Mags.” As a Sex Educator and Sexologist, she is a college lecturer at Universities throughout the country who offers her unique brand of sex education. Follow her on Twitter @ankarad.

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