Men have a hot spot too. It is the prostate gland, which can be excited by massage. Prostate massage may arouse your lover to new levels of intimate pleasure because the area of the Rosebud/anus is surrounded with sensitive nerve endings.

Before doing prostate massage, you may need to have a latex glove or finger cots available, and you’ll certainly want plenty of lubricant. I call the prostate his ‘Hero spot’, because it takes a hero to be adventurous, secure in his masculinity and trusting with his
partner in order to embark on Hero Spot exploration.

Hero Spot/Prostate Massage

The prostate can be effectively stimulated by the insertion of a finger or vibrator into your lover’s Rosebud/anus and rectum.

1. Lubricate your finger, or a finger cover, and insert one or two fingers, palm up, in a “come hither” motion inside his anus.

2. Apply a light pressure either tapping or stroking towards the perineum. Ask your lover what feels best. Some men say their pleasure zone is just one knuckle inside the anus; others are deeper. Levels of pleasurable response vary with each individual.

3. Be sure to ask your lover how he likes to be stroked, including what kind of pressure and motions feel best.

4. Ask him to share his feelings of pleasure, anticipation and concern and if he would like to try it again.

For example, he might say:
Before, “I’ve never done this before,” or “I’m afraid your fingernails will hurt.”
During, “I feel vulnerable,” or “Don’t stop!”
After, “That felt better than anything I ever could have imagined,” or “That felt really good.”

TriGasm for Men

The TriGasm for Men It is the result of stiimulating 3 points of pleasure; the Lingam/penis, the Jewels/testicles and the Rosebud/anus simultaneously.

1. The man should lie back while his lover lavishes the head of his Lingam with some suction until he reaches a level 8 on a pleasure scale of 1 to 10.

2. She should then use her mouth and tongue to stimulate his Jewels for 2 minutes.

3. Return to the Lingam and orally increase his level of pleasure to a 9.5 (almost to the point of no return).

4. At this peak, fondle his Jewels, continue to orally delight his Lingam and insert a forefinger palm up into his Rosebud to find his Hero Spot then tap, tap tap it gently. If all goes well, he’ll have an unforgettable, mind-blowing TriGasm.

Orgasm vs. Ejaculation

For men, the art of staying relaxed in high states of arousal actually gives more energy to orgasm. A man can have a full body orgasm without ejaculation. Practicing lovemaking without ejaculation can give increased pleasure, which may result in multiple orgasms. During these exercises, it is important to find your point of “inevitability” for ejaculation. Practice these exercises for separating your orgasm from ejaculation with and without, your lover.

1. Lie down on your back and ask your lover to begin a genital caress with her
hands or mouth.

2. You are now going to do a series of low-level pleasuring peaks on the pleasure scale of 0 to 10, with 10 being orgasm.

3. Give her feedback so she knows when to slow down or intensify her caresses.

4. Switch positions with your lover now lying on her back with her legs in the air slightly bent. In the Missionary position, reach a series of peaks while having Maithuna/intercourse.

5. Start with slow penetration and peak up to a level 5 on the pleasure scale and back off by squeezing your PC muscle.

6. Peak to level 6 and back off by squeezing the PC muscle. Slow down your breathing and open your eyes. Release sexual energy through your throat Chakra.

7. Repeat as above to level 7.

8. Repeat as above to level 8.

9. Repeat as above to level 9.

10. Thrust all the way up to just before the point of no return at level 9.5.

11. Both lovers should stop moving, the male lover squeezing his PC muscle as hard as he can. Synchronize your breathing, open your eyes and focus on each other with the intention to prolong lovemaking.

12. If you stopped thrusting in time, you will have experienced an orgasm without ejaculation.

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

When a man has his Lingam worshiped by his lover, he feels a deep emotional and physical connection towards her. The gratification he gets enables him to surrender himself to her
female Goddess power.

Lingam Love Strokes

1. The Secret to Moving His Sexual Energy: You can direct sexual energy from his genital area to other body parts, particularly the heart Chakra, to create more of a connection. While stroking his Lingam with your right hand, move your left hand up the center of his body to his heart.

2. The X Stroke: Move your right hand over his right hip across his Lingam to his left nipple like a giant ‘X’. Then move your left hand over his left hip across his Lingam to his right nipple in a fluid motion.

3. Spiraling the Stalk: Both hands go in opposite directions in a corkscrew motion over the Lingam. One hand twists up while the other hand twists downwards. Make sure you use some lubricant or massage oil.

4. Blended Bliss: Stroke his Lingam with your prominent hand and stimulate his prostate externally by sliding your fist back and forth over the perineum. Make sure you use some lubricant or massage oil.

5. Making the Fire: Rub his Lingam with both hands as if rubbing a stick to make a fire. Make sure you use some lubricant or massage oil.

6. The Thousand Yoni Stroke: Rub his Lingam from the top to the bottom covering the glans (head) and sliding your hands down to the base with one hand after another in a fluid motion. Make sure you use some lubricant or massage oil. This will give him the erotic sensation of entering a thousand different Yonis.

Male Oral Delights for Her to Give Him

If you suffer from the ‘gag reflex’, leave your tongue outside of your mouth, then suck and lick his Lingam.

1. Get into a comfortable position so that you don’t get a sore back or neck and put his buttocks on a pillow for easy access.

2. Put his Lingam inside of your cheeks to avoid ‘gag reflex’, then suck and lick his Lingam.

3. Always use your hands as an extension of your mouth.

4. Try to keep eye contact with your lover.

5. Pump his Lingam up by squeezing it in the palm of your hand.

6. Use the tip of your tongue from side to side across his urethral opening.

7. His frenulum deserves extra licking, kissing and gentle sucking.

8. Wrap your lips tightly around his glans (head) and use plenty of suction.

9. Flick your tongue around his coronal ridge (around the base of the glans).

10. Lick and lap his raphe with the flat of your tongue (underside/seam of his penis).

11. Change your rhythm from long, slow sucking to short, fast, milking action.

12. Shake and wiggle his Lingam in your mouth.

13. Hold the base tight while making spiral motions around the glans.

14. Gently tug his scrotum while sucking him from the shaft to the glans.

15. Push on his perenium (between the Rosebud and the Jewels) while sucking.

16. Put your finger (palm up) inside his mouth, while giving him oral love.

17. Stroke his ‘Hero Spot’ (just inside the Rosebud) while sucking.

18. For ‘deep throating’ keep your head back and let him straddle you.

19. Stimulate his glans with your index finger while you are sucking.

20. Suck on an ice cube prior to oral love.

21. Drink some hot liquid prior to oral love.

22. Make humming sounds during oral love for some extra vibration.

23. Rub fruits and juices on his Lingam and lick them off.

24. Put his Lingam between your Pillows of Compassion/breasts (cleavage fornication) for variety.

25. Wrap beads around his Jewels tugging gently while sucking.

26. Stroke his Lingam lovingly with your hair and
your face.

27. Gargle with mouthwash or suck on a mint prior to oral love for a tingle.

28. Don’t change your rhythm just before he climaxes unless he asks you to!

29. Ask him how he wants to be sucked; gently, hard, slow, fast, deep…

30. Enthusiasm is more important than technique!

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

In Tantra, “Attention” is the follow through of “Intention” because where the attention goes, energy glows. Attention is all about being 100% present for your lover. Attention is also about focusing intently on their pleasure and sharing your emotions with each other. In the following interactive exercises you will learn how to look into your lover’s soul, and how to make love with your full focus. Attention is an essential element to experiencing Tantric bliss.

Give your lover the full attention that they deserve.

Attention Exercises with your Lover:

1. Buttocks: Caress and feather your lover’s buttocks around the crease where the buttocks and upper leg meet with a feather or your hair.

2. Feet: Massage your lovers feet with a feather, fingers, tongue or hair.

3. Toes: Blindfold your lover and kiss his/her feet. Suck on the toes as if you were kissing him/her on the mouth.

4. Thighs: Blindfold your lover and tickle the inside of your lover’s thighs with a feather, your hair or fingernails.

5. Knees: Lick behind your lover’s knees.

6. Buttocks Contact: Sit astride your lover’s back so that your Lingam or Yoni is in contact with the buttocks and rub your genitals gently over it.

7. Fingers: Massage, kiss and suck on and in between your lover’s fingers.

8. Stomach: Rub your Yoni or Lingam against your lover’s stomach.

9. Lips: Suck on your lover’s bottom lip, and then explore your lover’s mouth with your tongue.

10. Attention: Finish this sentence, “I want you to pay more attention to my…”.

11. I Want: Pay attention as I show you how and where I want to be worshiped.”

12. The TriGasm: Stimulate her Pearl, G-spot and Rosebud simultaneously using your tongue, finger, feather or Lingam for at least 6 minutes. Then stimulate his Lingam, Jewels and Hero Spot simultaneoulsy.

13. Polishing the Pearl: Lift the clitoral hood up over her Pearl and make circular motions around it (not on it) with your tongue for at least 4 minutes.

14. Kiss Her Yoni: Kiss your woman by focusing your energy on her outer and inner Yoni lips. Explore the area around her Pearl (clitoris) for 2 minutes.

15. Penis Bliss: Stroke his Lingam with your prominent hand and stimulate his Hero Spot, Rosebud and Jewels externally by sliding your knuckles back and forth over the perineum (landing strip between the Rosebud/anus and testicles). Use plenty of lube or oil and ask for verbal feedback from your man. Do this for 3 minutes.

16. Find her G-spot: Ask your woman for permission to enter her Yoni. Then gently insert your ring finger inside one and a half to two inches. Curl your finger in a “come here” motion so that you can easily locate her G-spot. It is located on the upper vaginal wall before you get to the cervix. It will feel like a small area (about the size of a dime) with ridges on it, much like the roof of your you have found it, slowly, tap, tap, tap your finger
up towards her navel as you stimulate her G-spot. Ask your lover for verbal feedback. Do this for 6 minutes and use plenty of lubricant.

10. The Venus Butterfly: Orally stimulate the Pearl until your lover is on the verge of orgasm, and then find her G-spot simultaneously. Ask her for feedback. Use lubricant if necessary.

11. Goddess Waterfall: Starting very gently, run the tip of your tongue with varying degrees of firmness like running water down one side of her outer lips from the clitoral hood to her perineum. Then tap your tongue down the same side from the hood to the perineum like the pitter-patter of mist drops in a waterfall. Exhale warmly around the outside of her Yoni as you make sounds of pleasure to convey to her how much you are enjoying honoring her.

12. Godly Waterfall: Run the tip of your tongue with varying firmness like running water up one side of the Lingam from the base to the tip and then bring your fingertips down the other side from the tip to the base like the pitter patter of mist drops in a waterfall.

Paying Attention to Your Lover

Focus on listening to your lover the next time he/she speaks to you and acknowledge what he/she said in your own words. Give your lover a Tantric massage by focusing only on his/her pleasure. Then exchange roles. When making love, keep your eyes open and look into your lovers soul. Pay attention to your lover’s needs and be 100% present when he/she needs you.

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

Tantric Sounds

Sound releases energy and during lovemaking, sounds release sexual energy. Sound will also amplify sensation, as the sound waves vibrate throughout the body. If you hold back the sounds you feel inside, it will manifest into inhibitions, resentments and anger. So for your own good health, give yourself permission to express yourself through words, sounds, sighs, cries, shouts and laughter.

In the following interactive sound exercises you will learn how to communicate through humming, the sounds of sex and how to articulate your sexual wants, needs and fears. Sound is an essential element to experiencing Tantric bliss.

Making love without sound is like watching a movie on mute.

The Sound of Your Chakras

Each Chakra has its own sound and when you chant the matching sound or Mantra, you will energize, empower and open each Chakra. Make it a ritual to ‘voice activate’ each of your Chakras every day. This exercise should be done facing your lover. Synchronize your chanting for at least five minutes.

Root: Place your hand upon your perineum (the strip between the Rosebud/anus and the Jewels/testicles on men and the strip between the Rosebud/anus and the Yoni/vagina on women). Squeeze your sphincter mus- cles and chant ‘Lam, Lam, Lam, Lam.’

Sacral: Place your hand over your sacral (sexual organs) and as you chant, squeeze your Love Muscles/ PC muscles (the muscle you use to stop the flow of urine) and chant ‘Vam, Vam, Vam, Vam’.

Solar Plexus: Place your hand over your navel. Inhale and exhale feeling your belly expand and chant Ram, ‘Ram, Ram, Ram.’

Heart: Place your hand over your heart and chant ‘Yam, Yam, Yam, Yam’.

Throat: Place your hand around your throat and chant ‘Ham, Ham, Ham, Ham’.

Third Eye: Place your hand in between your eyebrows and chant ‘Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh’.

Crown: Place your hand on top of your head and chant ‘Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, Mmm’.

Creative Visualization

This time place your prominent hand over your lovers Chakras, chant the matching sound while visualizing the color of the Chakra with your eyes closed.

Tantric Colors & Visualizations

Root: Visualize a deep red color. Red represents physical strength, vitality and stability.

Sacral: Visualize a bright orange color. Orange is associated with warm creative energy that nourishes us.

Solar Plexus: Visualize a golden yellow color. Yellow stimulates the emotions and enhances our power within.

Heart: Visualize a crisp, green color. Green represents life, nourishment, balance and harmony.

Throat: Visualize a sky blue color. Blue is associated with peace, calm, confidence and clarity.

Third Eye: Visualize an indigo color. Indigos’ deep color represents positive, intuitive strength.

Crown: Visualize a violet color. Violet is the regal color of your higher power and it represents acceptance and understanding of the Universe.

Sound Exercises with your Lover

1. Mmm: Tell your lover what sounds you want to hear during lovemaking.

2. Yes: Tell your lover what words you want to hear during lovemaking.

3. Oooh: Pretend you are building up to having a climax and make those sounds for your lover to hear.

4. Turn-on: Tell your lover 2 of your greatest turn-ons.

5. Turn-off: Tell your lover 1 sexual turnoff.

6. Fantasy: Whisper a sexual fantasy that you have in your lover’s ear.

7. Blend: Hold each other, close your eyes and blend the sounds of love for 2 minutes.

8. My Body: Tell your lover what parts of your body you love the most.

9. Position: Tell your lover your favorite sexual position and why.

10. Worship: Ask your lover how he/she wants to be worshiped and then comply.

11. Lover’s Appreciation: Exchange a physical, an appreciative and an emotional compliment with each other. (An emotional compliment is one that let’s your lover know that they are making a difference in your life and it makes the heart sing).

12. Name that Yoni/Lingam: Name each other’s genitals in a way that honors your lover’s sacred sexuality. If they already have a name, give them a new nickname.

13. Tantric Lovemaking: Get into Yab Yum position or Missionary position and simulate the movements and sounds of making love. Use moans, whispers, panting, giggling, growling and heavy breathing. This can be done dressed or naked.

14. Happy Sighs: Get into Yab Yum position or Missionary position and hold each other cheek to cheek, then sigh gently, lovingly into each other’s ears for 2 minutes. Express yourselves through the sound of your sighs and the touch of your bodies only.

15. Yoni/Lingam Talk: If your Lingam or Yoni could talk, what would it say? Have a conversation between the Lingam and Yoni to discuss what you want sexually from each other.

16. Sexual Hum: Put your mouth over one of your lover’s erogenous zones; navel, breasts, buttocks, Lingam or Yoni; their choice. Make sensual humming sounds combined with breathing for 2 minutes. Let him/her feel the vibrations of your sexual energy.

17. Share a Fantasy: Start telling your lover about a sexual fantasy that you have, and after 2 minutes your lover must finish the fantasy.

18. Memorable Erotica: Look at your lover and finish this sentence: “The most memorable erotic experience that I have ever had with you was when we….”

19. Significance: Ask your lover to name 3 of the most significant times in your relationship. Then share your most significant times with your lover.

20. Lovable: Tell your lover what makes him/her so lovable for at least 2 minutes. Then it’s his/her turn to tell you what makes you so lovable.

21. Rate your Erogenous Zones: Blindfold your lover and then kiss 4 major erogenous zones (such as lips, ears, nipples, Yoni, Lingam, testicles). Ask your lover to rate them from 1 to 10 with 10 being the most pleasurable. Do this for 2 minutes.

22. Finger Licking Good: Blindfold your lover. Suck on each one of his/her fingers in slow motion. Make the kinds of sounds you would make when you are enjoying a delicious meal. Feel free to exaggerate with slurps and sensual noises.

Sing Like No-one Is Listening!

Hum to yourself every day, say words you find embarrassing out loud, sing like no-one is listening, make love without restraining your sounds.

Chant OHM (for the crown Chakra to open), AH (for the heart Chakra to open) and HOM (for the sex Chakra to open). This chant will unite these physical areas.

Practice asking your lover for what you need, compliment your lover and praise him/her when they do something you enjoy. Don’t hold back resentments, communicate hurt feelings and create closure with your lover.

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

The lack of movement can leave your body feeling tight and tired. It also restricts energy flow and can block emotions; especially sexual ones. Even when you visualize parts of your body moving, you are creating physiological sensations.

In the following interactive exercises you will experience moving different parts of your body with your lover. The physical connection will be different than the standard lovemaking positions you may have experienced in the past. Some of the movements will be playful, while others will be spiritual or sexual. Movement is an essential element to reaching Tantric bliss.

Movement Exercises with your Lover

1. Pelvic Circles: Do circles with your pelvis while standing facing your lover for 2 minutes. Play music if you like.

2. Finger Talk: Touch each other’s face in slow motion with fingertips and communicate only through your eyes and fingers for 2 minutes.

3. Tantric Dance: Hold each other close and move your entire bodies, but not your feet for 2 minutes (add music if you like).

4. Tantric Hug: Put your arms around each other, bury your head in each others neck and press your bodies together for 2 minutes.

5. Tantric Kiss: Press your bodies together and kiss passionately for 2 minutes.

6. Eyelid Kiss: Lick your lover’s eyelids and kiss his/her eyelids tenderly.

7. Dominate: Dominate your lover by holding him/her down and kiss and caress him/her wherever you want to.

8. Striptease: Do a striptease for your lover and take off two pieces of clothing.

9. Feather: Use the feather on your own body and show your lover where it turns you on the most.

10. Rock the Cradle: Get into Yab Yum position or kneel in front of each other. Embrace. Breathe together, eye-gaze and rock your pelvis back and forth together at the same time. As you breathe in, the belly fills up and you both rock back. The belly expands from breath. As you exhale you rock towards each other. Do this exercise for 2 minutes.

11. Sensate Focus: Take turns showing your lover how you want to be touched on your face and neck. Now your lover should emulate the same touches that you just showed him/her. Give each other verbal feedback (you may use a feather or a blindfold to heighten this experience). Do ‘Sensate Focus’ for 2 minutes. Add music if you like.

12. Surrender: Take turns receiving loving caresses and kisses from your lover for 2 minutes.

13. Body Worship: Worship your lover’s body by caressing him/her with the feather or your hair followed by baby kisses. Both of you should make sounds of love and move in unison to the rhythm of your foreplay.

14. Yin Yang Kissing: Decide who will be Yin and who will be Yang. The Yang (active lover) has to explore with his/her tongue the Yin’s mouth (receptive lover) until he/she has kissed for at least 2 minutes. Then exchange roles for 2 more minutes.

15. Hand Dancing: Rub your (own) hands together and feel the warm energy as you slowly bring them apart, then put your hands against your lover’s hands and feel the heat/energy as you hand dance together. Decide who will be Yin (follower) and who will be Yang (initiator). Yin must follow Yang’s movements, keep your hands pressed up against each others for 1 minute, and then Yang must follow Yin’s movements for 1 minute.

16. Standing Cradle Rock: Stand in front of your lover with hands on hips, feet pointing ahead. Bend knees slightly and rock your pelvis cradle (back and forth) in slow motion. Go in circles, then side to side for 2 minutes simultaneously. Have fun with this and play music.

17. The Pelvis Roll: This is a variation on the ‘Missionary’ position with the man on his knees while his lover raises her knees and rests her feet on his chest. The woman has her arms and hands free to caress herself or her man. During penetration, she can roll her pelvis up and down so that his Lingam can stimulate her G-spot. The woman must surrender herself to complete and utter Tantric pleasure. Use lubricant if necessary.

18. The Swooping Goddess: This is a variation on the ‘Woman On Top’ position. She is on top with her feet on the bed or ground and her toes pointed for extra elevation. The woman needs to have strong legs for this position because she is doing all the thrusting (swooping) down on her man while he lays back, surrenders and receives. Her hands are free to caress herself or her man. Use lubricant if necessary.

19. The Crouching Tigress: This is a variation on the rear entry position. The woman gets on all fours and crouches like a wild cat with her buttocks raised high, while her man presses his lower body against her on his knees. He has the freedom to hold onto her buttocks, hips or waist. This position gives the man complete power to penetrate his lover. If the strokes are too deep and fast it may cause her discomfort, so to enhance the pleasure for both man and woman, he should thrust his Lingam into her Yoni ever so slowly and then work up to a more rapid penetration as and when she desires it. Use lubricant if necessary.

20. Enhanced Tantric Kiss: Get into Yam Yum Position. Begin your kiss by tracing the outline of your lover’s lips. Then take your lover’s bottom lip between the two of yours and suck gently. Next, wrap your lips around your lover’s tongue and suck on it with passion. Finally get a cube of ice and put it in your mouth as you kiss your lover. Continue to kiss until the ice has melted. This exercise is even more fun during Maithuna/intercourse.

21. Sixty Nine: Decide who will be Yang (on top) and who will be Yin (on bottom) and get into the classic sixty nine position. The woman gently tugs her man’s scrotum while sucking his Lingam from the base to the glans (head) changing her rhythm to long, slow sucking to short, fast milking motions. Simultaneously, the man nuzzles his face into his woman’s Yoni and licks her labia and Pearl/clitoris while stroking her perineum (between the Rosebud/anus and the Yoni opening) for at least 5 minutes.

22. Animals: Get into an animal pose with your lover and make the sounds and movements of your chosen animal. You can be a snake and slither all over your lover, a monkey who playfully explores his/her lover, a cat who snuggles, or any other animal you choose. Play with each other for 2 minutes and guess what animal your lover chose.

23. Musical Instrument: Imagine you are a musician, choose an instrument, and play a rhythm on your lover’s body for 2 minutes. You can play a concerto up and down your lover’s body, stand them up and pretend to play the cello or just get down and dirty with your lover’s flute. The choice is yours.

Connect Each Day

Hold hands, hug your lover every day. Cuddle at bedtime. Stretch your body, take a walk at least once a week and dance whenever possible with your lover. Caress your own body, discover your own erogenous zones, then do the same with your lover and ask him/her to rate their erogenous zones from 1-10.

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Excerpt from: Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

Breath is Life

Breath is the essence of life and there is no better way to energize the body than to increase your intake of oxygen. Breathing in through the mouth produces an energy charge and breathing out of the mouth releases emotions. That’s why when a person cries, they have to breathe through their mouth.

Nostril breathing holds in the energy charge and it enhances sexual control. In the following interactive breath exercises, you will learn how to control your breath and how to synchronize it with your lover so that you can make lovemaking last longer. You will find that you can connect on a deeper level of consciousness and experience harmonious bonding through breath. Breathing together is an essential element to experiencing
Tantric bliss.

When you are sexually excited, your breathing increases naturally. Consequently, you have less control over your orgasm. Many people want lovemaking to last longer. Several methods have been devised to assist you in prolonging the pleasures and intimacy of sex. The following exercises will help move your sexual energy throughout your body; not just localize it in the genitals.

Tantric Breath

Breath Exercises with Your Lover

*While these exercises are written in He/She pronouns and Man/Woman genders, any couple can do these techniques together regardless of sexual orientation and gender to include GLBTQ+ couples and non-binary individuals. Regardless of gender, we all have both masculine and feminine energies (Yin/Yang) that are more prominent at different times.

Synchronized Breath: Face each other. Hold hands, breathe in and out through the mouth at the same time for 2 minutes.

Alternate Breathing: Face each other. Hold hands and breathe in through your nose and exhale through the mouth in slow motion for 2 minutes.

Kissing Breath: Hold each other, eyes closed, and share the same breath through deep kissing for 2 minutes.

Erogenous Breath: Blow your cool breath with lips pursed around and onto your lover’s nipples for 2 minutes.

Hot Breath: Choose one of your lover’s Chakras and blow your hot breath through your open mouth for 2 minutes as you caress your lover.

Hum Breath: Face each other and hum every time you breath out for 2 minutes.

Toe Breath: Exhale your cool breath in between your lover’s toes. All of them.

Auditory Breath: Suck on your lover’s ear lobes and breathe gently in his/her ears.

Spine Breath: Ask your lover to lie down on his/her stomach and blow your cool breath up your lover’s spine all the way to his/her neck and back down over the buttocks. Nudity required.

Neck Breath: Blow cool and hot breath (mouth pursed and open) on and around your lover’s neck; front and back.

Yin Yang Breath: Alternate Breathing. Face your lover in Yab Yum position. Decide who will be Yin (receiver) and who will be Yang (giver) to start. Yin should breathe in through the nose, as Yang exhales through the mouth for 2 minutes. Then switch roles for 2 more minutes. Maintain eye contact as you do this.

Hot and Cold Breath: Choose one of your lover’s Chakras and blow your cool breath from your mouth through pursed lips on to it, then your warm breath (through an open mouth) with your lips apart. Alternate your hot and cool breath on your lover for 2 minutes.

Control Breath: Face each other, kneeling or sitting with legs over each other, whichever is most comfortable for you both. Now simultaneously take a deep breath filling up and expanding your bellies. Hold that breath for 5 seconds, then exhale from the throat releasing a gentle sighing sound. Do this for 2 minutes and maintain eye-contact with each other.

Synchronized Breathing: Face your lover; kneeling or sitting with legs over each other, which ever is most comfortable for you both. Breathe in at the same time, then breathe out together in slow motion for 2 minutes. Maintain eye-contact as you do this.

Nostril Breathing: Face your lover. The woman should breathe through her right nostril (for one minute) while blocking the left nostril. The man should breathe through his left nostril while blocking the right one for 1 minute, then alternate for the 2nd minute.

Charging Breath: Get into Yab Yum position. Inhale and exhale through your nose using the pumping action of your abdominal muscles to force the exhalation. The emphasis should be on the exhalation. Breathe in through the nostrils and release your breath through your nostrils and pump your abdominal muscles at the same time. Do this for 2 minutes.

Hearing Breath: Get into Yab Yum position, and breathe gently, sighing behind your lover’s earlobes for 2 minutes in unison. Be careful not to use excess sound around the ears because they can be highly sensitive.

Cannon Breath: Sit back to back with Chakras aligned and say, “As we do this breath, I honor you.” Then inhale one long deep breath (through the nose and exhale through the mouth) as if it were shooting out of cannon for 2 minutes. If either of you become lightheaded during this exercise, communicate to your lover that you need to stop. This is a good alternative to arguing.

Lingam Yoni Breath: For this intimate breath, the woman needs to get into a traditional ‘Woman On Top’ sexual Maithuna/intercourse position. She is the Yang (masculine) force so she is the initiator. Now both man and woman should start breathing in and out together. Fill up your bellies as you inhale and collapse your bellies as you exhale. This can be done during intercourse or without penetration. The choice is yours.

Heart Beat: Put your arms around your lover and rest one of your ears on his/her heart Chakra. Listen to the soothing sound of the heart beat and the sound of your lover’s breath for 2 minutes. Tell your lover what you heard and how it made you feel.

Neck Massage: Massage your lover’s neck with your hands and follow each stroke with your breath. Do this for 2 minutes.

Yoni Lingam Breath: Get into the traditional sixty-nine position. The woman should blow her cool breath around the Lingam, Jewels, perineum (testicles and the landing strip between from testicles to anus) while the man blows his warm breath around her Yoni, (not inside the Yoni) around the Rosebud/anus and up and down the perineum. Do this for 2 minutes minimum.

Abdominal Breathing

Abdominal breathing exercises can help relax the pelvic region and prolong the level of sexual excitement in masturbation and lovemaking. The purpose of this exercise is to develop awareness of your body while practicing relaxed breathing. By experiencing specific body movements coordinated with deep breathing you will learn how to continue deep breathing while engaged in sexual activity.

1. Commence abdominal breathing by lying on the floor or a bed with arms at your side and legs uncrossed.

2. Close your eyes and begin breathing slowly. Inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth.

3. Place one hand gently on your lower abdomen and focus on the movement of your stomach as you breathe. The goal is to develop comfortable and relaxed breathing in the pelvic region.

4. Continue abdominal breathing and as you inhale, turn your right foot out to the side. As you exhale, turn your right foot back up so the toes point up toward the ceiling. Do this six times and then switch to the left foot.

5. Repeat the above exercise sequence again, first with the right foot then with the left. Watch and help each other to do the abdominal breathing.

Pelvic Breathing

The purpose of pelvic breathing is to help coordinate pelvic movement with breathing during lovemaking. Remember, the power of breath controls both the male and female orgasms.

1. Lie on your back, on the floor or bed, with your arms at your sides and your legs uncrossed.

2. Breathe slowly, using abdominal breathing for a few minutes to establish your rhythm.

3. As you inhale, press your buttocks toward the floor and fill your abdomen with air.

4. As you exhale, imagine that your pubic bone is being drawn towards the ceiling by a magnet.

5. Your pelvis will slowly tilt up as you exhale.

6. Repeat this at least ten times. It is important to have the pelvis tilt backward on the inhalation and tilt forward on the exhalation.

7. Do the same exercise kneeling with your hands flat on the floor in front of you. Watch and help each other to do the pelvic breathing.

Make A Commitment

Make a commitment to take long deep breaths while you are doing every day activities, such as driving, watching TV, reading reports, taking a bath and so on. When you are stressed out, inhale 4 breaths then exhale 4 breaths (‘Stress Breath’). When you are upset, inhale one long deep breath and then exhale it with force as if it were shooting out of a canon (‘Canon Breath’). When you are angry, inhale 4 breaths and then stick your
tongue out as you exhale with force (‘Dragon Breath’). It will make you laugh and you’ll forget what you were angry about. When you make love, slow down your normal breathing pattern because the faster the breath flows, the faster the orgasm.

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Excerpt from Dr. Ava’s Tantra Workbook

A sexy kiss can be one of the most erotic exchanges between lovers. A kiss is often the first intimate physical contact with a new lover and some people believe they can tell a lot about a person’s lovemaking skills by the way they kiss. Some people can reach orgasm through kissing alone.

Not wanting to be kissed by your lover is a signal of trouble in the relationship. Making kissing a daily ritual will embolden and re-ignite passion in your relationship and keep the juices flowing. There are many different kinds of kisses: slow, quick, deep, wet, hard, soft, breathy, and then there is Tantric kissing. Kiss your lover at least twice a day and experiment with the different kinds of kisses from below.

Tantric Kissing Techniques

Eye brow kissing: Face your lover in Yab Yum position, either ‘Woman On Top’ or man on top, moisten each other’s eyebrows and then lean into each other with brows touching. Touch lips and feel the energy flow from one to the other uniting the two of you into a higher level of consciousness.

Yin Yang kissing: Take turns kissing each other tenderly and then deeply, alternate back to tender and back to deep for 2 minutes. This will create the weaving of the Yin and Yang energy that you and your lover can both experience simultaneously.

Synchronized kissing: Embrace in your favorite lovemaking position with Lingam and Yoni touching, but not inserted. With your lips slightly open and touching, inhale together gently and exhale together, sharing and synchronizing the same breath.

Orgasmic kissing: In a loving face-to-face Maithuna/intercourse position with Lingam inserted into Yoni, lock lips, eye-gaze and take turns inhaling and exhaling alternately. Share the deep level of intimacy and feel your lover’s sexual breath enter your body and spirit.

More Tantric Kissing Tips

1. Build sexual anticipation by kissing all around your lover’s face with soft, baby kisses and use your hands to caress the face, hair or body.

2. Use your nose to nuzzle and your lips to caress to your lover.

3. Tease your lover by tracing the outline of your his or her lips with the tip of your tongue.

4. Now put your heart and body into a slow kiss alternating the pressure from gentle to deep with mouth slightly open.

5. Take your lover’s bottom lip between yours and suck gently. Vocalize some sounds of pleasure.

6. Take turns licking your lover’s upper and lower teeth with your tongue. Then alternate.

7. Wrap your lips around your lover’s tongue and suck passionately alternating your speed from slow to quick.

8. Explore the inside of your lover’s mouth with your tongue by running it in small and large circles. Alternate.

9. Dart your tongue in and out of your lover’s mouth rapidly and then slowly. Remember to use your entire body and make all those wonderful sounds of love.

10. Use hot or cold liquids to create new kissing sensibilities.