I’ve been saying Never Negotiate Naked for years now, but I must have picked it up somewhere along the way in my sexological journey.
When we’re in the heat of the moment – clothes are flying off, kissing, touching, heavy breathing – it’s delicious. Everything is so intense. It has to happen RIGHT NOW or you will burst. It’s also a time when we aren’t thinking very clearly. Which is why it’s helpful to negotiate before the action begins. State your intentions. Talk about your safer-sex practices and preferences. Perhaps a Yes-No-Maybe sort of boundaries and limits discussion. To really reduce the pressure, do this in a completely non-sexual setting. Sure, it might get you all hot & bothered as you talk (That’s great!), but this way you can be as clear-headed as possible while negotiating your play.