Penis Way Too Big? There’s A New Sex Toy For That

For anyone who has ever been with someone with a penis so freaking huge you can barely “get it in there”, a new device has come to the rescue! The innovative sex toy company Perfect Fit has invented what they call “The Bumper”. The silicone device fits snugly around the base of the Johnson and the boys, and provides “more cushion for the pushin’.”

According to the company “The Bumper is composed of two parts that can be used independently or together to create a protective layer of padding when the thrusts get deep. The bumper acts like a cushion between two partners to absorb some of the bumping while providing a sensation of maximum depth for the penis.”

The device can be used for women having a hard time having rigorous intercourse because their vagina is too small for their man’s massive organ. The company says that “For women, it serves as a sexual health aid to lessen the chances of a bruised cervix.”  You know you have a donkey dick when…

It can also be used by gay men during anal sex. Or vaginal sex with a trans person whose vagina is “shorter” than a cisgender person who was born with a vagina. “The Bumper is adjustable, so users can add more cushions to suit their depth requirement,” say the inventors. “By making deep penetration less intense, the Bumper will allow sexual partners to try previously avoided positions with new confidence.”

The inventors spent a lot of time thinking about this thing and say “For every size queen, there is someone who thinks small is beautiful.”

“Receiving partners who experience discomfort during intercourse may find solace in the Bumper’s ability to make sex more enjoyable by keeping penetration within their comfort zone, says Perfect Fit, “Penetrating partners will still have the feeling of full insertion and intimate contact with their partner–without trying to hold back.”

Perfect Fit CEO Steve Callow is known for his totally unique pleasure inducing sex toys, including a stretchy penis extender that turns a man’s mini penis into a mega monster. His line of ball stretchers and cock rings are huge bestsellers, and the most talked about product of the year was the company’s “Buck Off,” a sex toy designed by Buck Angel for FTM/Female To Male Trans Men with a vagina who have an enlarged clitoris from taking hormones, and want to jerk off like the rest of us.

To all the people who could not fully enjoy the ‘ol in and out with your man’s gigantic Godzilla penis before, you will now be able to walk painlessly afterward.

The sex toy will be released soon.

 

 

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Anka Radakovich is a legendary Sex Columnist, Certified Sexologist, Sex Educator, Screenwriter, and Author of the book THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, PART 2, Tales from New York to Hollywood. THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, Part 2 is her third book. Her first two books, The Wild Girls Club; Tales from below the Belt, and Sexplorations; Journeys to the Erogenous Frontier were both published by Crown/Random House. She was the Sex Columnist for DETAILS Magazine for 9 years and currently writes columns for Brides.com and Los Angeles Magazine. Her writing has appeared in dozens of magazines including Marie Claire, Women’s Health, Men’s Health, Harper’s Bazaar, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Men's Journal, Seventeen, Glamour, and Maxim. She has appeared on numerous television shows including 8 appearances with Conan O’Brien. She was a Jeopardy question under the category “Men’s Mags.” As a Sex Educator and Sexologist, she is a college lecturer at Universities throughout the country who offers her unique brand of sex education. Follow her on Twitter @ankarad.

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