May Is “Masturbation Month” And Lube Makes “Making The Gravy” More Fun

May is “National Masturbation Month,” and we encourage everyone to celebrate “a date with Mrs. Parker’s Five Daughters.” Masturbation is fun, and “spanking the monkey,” “fighting the purple helmet warrior,” “rubbing the pink canoe,” “taking your turn at the self-serve station,” and “beating the shit out of your midget friend,” is America’s most relaxing pastime.

National Masturbation Month was created to “promote sex-positive attitudes toward the practice of erotic self-stimulation.” It began in 1994, when Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders was fired from her position for saying that the kids should masturbate, rather than jump into riskier forms of sex. Good thinkin’ cuz teenage kids don’t know what they’re doing anyway.

In 1995, Good Vibrations crowned May 7th as “National Masturbation Day” as a protest and the entire month of May became National Masturbation Month. In 1999, the “Masturbate-a-Thon” was sponsored by Good Vibrations, all for charity, of course. The winner, a major wanker from Japan, not only won the coveted title, but the Guinness world record for number of hours masturbating as well. Talk about having too much time on your hands.

To make masturbation more fun, we suggest using lube. A recent sex survey conducted by Skyn Condoms found that 70% of people who used lube found sex with themselves or with someone else, to be more satisfying. Lube makes playing with yourself more “smoove.”

Skyn’s “Maximum Performance,” for example is silicone based, not greasy, and lasts for as long as you do, even if that’s only two minutes, which is all good if you’re doing yourself.

According to the Wicked Sensual Xare Ultra line, “Silicone-based lubricants, such as items from the Wicked Sensual Care Ultra line, stay on the skin’s surface and are not easily dissolved or dispersed in water. Consequently, they create excellent slip-and-slide, last longer than water-based products and are ideal for intimate moments in the shower, bath, and beyond. They are tasteless, fragrance-free, do not contain glycerin or parabens, and offer an intensely luxurious, slippery smooth feel.”

There are also flavored lubes, “arousing” lubes that stimulate the clitoris with cinnamon, mint, or arginine, as well as cannabis-infused lubes, like the highly recommended Foria, which is a game changer in the lube world. I tried it and yes, it totally got “the little lady down there” stoned. The cannabis oil relaxed “it” so that is was more sensitive to the touch, heightened the sensations, and made sex with myself an even more fun experience. Next I just have to try it with someone other than myself.

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Anka Radakovich is a legendary Sex Columnist, Certified Sexologist, Sex Educator, Screenwriter, and Author of the new book THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, PART 2, Tales from New York to Hollywood. https://www.amazon.com/Wild-Girls-Club-Part-Hollywood/dp/0990462129/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, Part 2 is her third book. Her first two books The Wild Girls Club; Tales from below the Belt, and Sexplorations; Journeys to the Erogenous Frontier were both published by Crown/Random House. She was the Sex Columnist for DETAILS Magazine for 9 years and is currently a Sex Columnist for BRITISH GQ and Brides.com. Her writing has appeared in dozens of magazines including Marie Claire, Women’s Health, Men’s Health, Harper’s Bazaar, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Men's Journal, Seventeen, Glamour, and Maxim. She has appeared on numerous television shows including 8 appearances with Conan O’Brien. She was a Jeopardy question under the category “Men’s Mags.” As a Sex Educator and Sexologist, she is a college lecturer at Universities throughout the country who offers her unique brand of sex education. She lives in New York City. Follow her on Twitter @ankarad.

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