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Thursday, March 28, 2024

Love, Lust & Laughter Radio Podcast Featuring Dr. Ava!

Pleasure and passion is a sign of health – one of the vital signs, like your pulse rate. Dr Ava Cadell and Dr. Diana discuss the health benefits of sex – a longer life, improved heart health, pain relief, better sleep, reduced stress, an improved immune system, and improvements in your appearance and relationships. Dr. Ava also talked about her favorite female and male health devices. The Intensity delivers women pleasure with a purpose! Listeners can get $50 off the device with the PROMO code 50free at http://www.pourmoi.com. For men, Dr. Ava recommends the Private Gym, for which listeners can get 20% off with the PROMO code sexpert20 at http://www.privategym.com. This interview includes vital info from Dr. Ava’s many books and seminars.

Discovering pleasure with a partner is like pouring cement into a foundation. Physical touch that leads to ecstatic release not only releases hormones and endorphins that promote health and longevity, but also serve as the basis of biological bonding.

Click below to listen to the interview (approx. one hour):

Can A Woman Be A Slut & A Mom?

I remember the first time I was called a slut. I had been sleeping around a group of friends at our “brother” high school, including the boy with whom I lost my virginity, and the “body count” was piling up faster than a John Wayne Gacy biopic. I was fifteen, horny and thrilled to finally be getting male attention. They liked me they really liked me. Once they slept with me, they didn’t seem to like me as much, but I was remarkably unfazed by this. Ah teenage love… One fine day another kid from the aforementioned boys’ high school came up to me at the train station. He had light red hair and I thought he liked me so I talked to him, although he had kind of a weird vibe. Apropos of nothing, he said, “Why are you such a slut?”

I walked away, my heart pounding in humiliation, but resolute I wasn’t going to let him see me sweat. Even then I wondered why there wasn’t a word for a promiscuous boy? Calling a boy “Casanova,” “Don Juan,” or even “man whore” just didn’t seem insulting enough. The Sluts at my school and I were having a competition to add notches to the bedpost, even collecting ties from boys from the other school, and yet other girls would label them disparagingly. Where was the female James Bond, with a dude ready to roll around the sheets with in every port?

My career as a Slut progressed impressively, mildly impeded by being married for twelve years, in a relationship for fourteen. I was in the middle of bedding the strange and wonderful world of New York City men in my early twenties, when I met my ex-husband, and instantly knew we would get married, have kids; the whole works as we would say if we were ordering our relationship on a sandwich.

Throughout the fourteen years of my relationship with my husband I was 99.9% monogamous (except that one time at a yoga retreat in Oregon, but I confessed right afterwards.) The least I felt I owed my husband was to report my occasional platonic crushes on other people, male and female, the mere act of communicating them negating the dramatic experience of having a secret crush. As our marriage became more strained however, these crushes became much more like what the Internet would call “emotional affairs” but still not consummated (except that one guy who kissed me in a parking lot and I kissed him back, not in Oregon. But that’s it I swear.)

During the marriage, and as a mother of two small children, I saw myself as an ex-slut: someone who still loved sex, but had systematically negated its importance in my life. By the time I emerged from the marital cocoon, I was ready to take back the term and be the slutty butterfly I was always supposed to become. As a woman in my late thirties, I found that true to the old homily I was indeed at my sexual peak, with no shortage of suitors, in an age range I had not even considered when married. Apparently that whole MILF thing is really a thing, and there are plenty of guys who are excited by women who are confident in our own bodies, in a way we hadn’t been in our twenties when all the bits still had their media-approved perkiness.

I am a mother first. Also I am an artist- writer, actor, film-maker, comedian etc. I’m a friend, a daughter, and a person with many interests and personality “quirks.” I am also having the best sex of my life with other single people who want to have the best sex of their lives, but I’m not going to pretend that sometimes it doesn’t get emotionally messy.

As my views on sex have become more liberated, I have also found that the chemicals released when you sleep with someone (Oxytocin, Dopamine, Adrenaline) and their subsequent withdrawal, have been a great vehicle to understand more about myself and my expectations. What am I looking for exactly? Am I trying to fill my emptiness through another person? In order to be a truly self-actualized,ethical slut it is necessary to come from a place of wholeness—nothing is missing from my life—I simply want this sexual experience because I was lucky enough to be given a life to live and a body that functions perfectly. I am hereby taking back the word “slut,” just as female rappers have taken back the word “bitch.” I am a Slut. And loving it.

So the answer to the question: “Can a woman be a slut and a mom?” is “Yes. But not at the same time.”

*originally published at MalibuMom

Digital Indiscretions – Part Three: Obsessions

Digital Indiscretions is a three part series on infidelity in the age of technology. The series is based on Dr. Ebony Utley’s interviews with U.S. women about their experiences with infidelity. Interviewees chose their own pseudonyms to protect their privacy.

The use of technology is not only about whether one can or will be unfaithful. Technology also plays a prominent role in how much a betrayed person wants to know. Some women do not want to know any details about their partner’s infidelity. Some women want to know everything. The discovery options aided by technology are vast—cell phones, caller ID, voicemail, email, texts, instant messages, PayPal, bank records, social media profiles, digital recordings, and even online maps.

Some discoveries among the women I interviewed were accidental, but most were the result of a focused and intentional obsession with discovering information about a partner’s affair.

Irene acknowledged, “For a number of years I lost my mind and started going through every email, every file, every underneath.” Pauline noticed that her boyfriend of two years was leaving his phone face down and liking smiley faces that women posted on his Facebook pictures. One night while he was sleeping she went through his phone because as she said, “I turn into an FBI agent when all this stuff happens.”

Several women admitted that were not proud of their actions. Janet confessed to stalking her boyfriend’s other girlfriend on social media—mostly Instagram. “I was literally stalking. I’m not even going to lie. I’m checking and I was like, ‘What are you doing?’ It’s consuming some hours of my day because every hour I’m checking. Is she saying something? Are they together? Are they around each other? I have to stop.” Ironically, Janet did not have a Twitter or an Instagram account; she would log onto friends’ accounts to gather information.

Alesia conceded to going too far while confirming her boyfriend’s infidelity when she said, “And then another time, there was this girl who left a message on his cell phone. I called that girl, which is so out of character for me. I hated that! I’m calling these girls asking what the dude is doing and stuff like that. I hated that. Because that’s the girl I always tried to avoid being. Looking through cell phone bills and bank accounts; he took me out of my element and I didn’t like that.”

Linda’s husband was a serial cheater. She perused cell phone records and financial statements, called hotels, searched his computer and iPad, and read messages. She even emailed one of his mistresses.

“So I did something that’s not very nice. I created a fake Gmail account that sounded just like it would be his Gmail account and I emailed her and I said, ‘Hey, what’s going on? This is the best way to contact me right now. How’re you doing?’ She writes back, “Oh I feel like somebody that’s lost her best friend. I’ve missed you so much and not being able to talk to you is just awful. You can’t live like this. Your wife is crazy. Just go get a disposable cell phone. Go to the pay phone if they still have them. Do anything. I have to talk to you.” And so then I started asking questions. I made up questions that I supposed he would ask, like “What do you want from us?” And she said, “I want to be walking down the beach hand in hand, growing old together but I know that’s not what you’re telling me is going to happen.” That made me feel sad. I probably hurt her.

Linda admitted, “I have a PhD in each of his affairs.” Later in the interview she mused, “I think I got addicted to the hunt, the hunt for information.” A hunt that was made possible by the same technology her husband used to be unfaithful.

How obsessive would you become about a hunt? In “The Entire History of You” episode of an excellent series (I am very biased) titled Black Mirror, the characters each have a device called a grain that allows them to replay their past memories. Here’s a huge SPOILER ALERT: the main character becomes obsessive about his wife’s relationship with a “friend” and uses their grains to eventually confirm his wife’s infidelity. Watch the video:

The episode is incredibly entertaining and admittedly it seemed far-fetched until July 22, 2015, when Google received a patent for a searchable video archive of anyone wearing a device similar to Google Glass. A device and storage system like this could make recalling our sexual greatest hits easier than ever, but it would also make it easier for partners and others to hack them as well. How would you feel about living in a world where every aspect of one’s digital indiscretions were archived and accessible online? How obsessed would you become?

10 Best Libido Boosts When You Have Breast Cancer

Breast cancer can be detrimental to your sexiness. Undergoing extensive treatments from surgery to medication and radiation, stress, anxiety, changes in body image, side effects of treatment, pain, hormone fluctuations and even depression can negatively affect your libido. However, the good news is that you can heal and regain your sexual health during treatment and beyond.

With the understanding that each individual is different, here are 10 steps to help get your sexy back.

#1. Take Control

It’s a fact that some medications and treatments that help to fight cancer have side effects that can diminish your libido.  Observing what time of day or night you feel most energetic or more relaxed can help you tap into your own comfort level with regard to romance or sexuality. A vital part of getting your sexy back is to know yourself so that you can better share that inner sexpot with your partner.

#2. Love Who You Are

The first step in improving relationships with others is to take an inward look at yourself to build self-confidence and self-esteem.  If you’re single and not dating anyone special, there’s no need to share your medical history or disclose your cancer. Be sure to let your date see all of your healthy qualities, fun attributes and fabulous personality. Then see if there is any relationship possibility before you disclose your prognosis, as you do not want to define yourself by your physical condition.

#3. Healing Inside & Outside

Different people may experience varying levels of physical, mental and social anguish, but it is important to remember that there is hope. If you have a lack of desire from a hormone imbalance, or issues with body image or just a lack of support and understanding, it may contribute to social withdrawal, canceling plans with friends, shying away from family functions, etc. Reaching out is key to improving the whole person on the inside and the outside.

#4. Be Heard

The best way to clear feelings of fear, guilt, insecurity or even neglect is through open and honest communication. I know it’s not always easy to ask for what you want; so one way to start is to ask for little things like a hug. Then let your partner know where you are emotionally by telling them explicitly with no holds-barred honesty. One of the fundamentals to accessing your sexiness and letting go of inhibitions is feeling heard. Provide open communication about your needs to help make you feel sexy again, even if it is just patience!

#5.  Surrender To Pleasure

Remove yourself from reality and create your own sensory escapism like Shangri-La, a place of paradise and bliss. Light the bathroom with candles, put on soothing music, and fill the tub with bubbles and warm water. Enjoy the way you feel. Release yourself from negative thoughts and worries. Focus on the delight of eating some of your favorite foods such as chocolates or ice cream and get into a sexy state of mind by enhancing all five of your senses. Surrender to pleasure.

#6. Heal With Laughter

Humor and playfulness with friends, family, dates or lovers can trigger positive thoughts and emotional connections. Laughter is also a powerful remedy for pain, stress, depression and whatever ails you as it releases feel good hormones and prompts healthy changes in the body. Watch comedies on TV, at the movies or share jokes and funny stories to experience the healing power of laughter as it improves your mental, emotional and physical health.

#7. Keep Up Your Sexycises

Physical exercises can help to reduce the risk of breast cancer and help people to feel better while going through cancer treatments. A balance of aerobic, strength training, stretching is important, but always check with your doctor before undergoing any strenuous exercise regiment. Do your Kegel exercises regularly, but especially right before sexual intercourse to get the blood flowing to your sexual organs and strengthen the vaginal muscles. Medical devices for women like the Intensity or Apex do your kegel exercises for you while men can use PrivateGym. Remember, men get breast cancer too.

#8.  Connect Through Mindful Touch

Perhaps your illness is one of life’s challenges that will make you stronger as an individual and potentially draw you and your partner closer as a couple. Especially during trying times, couples need to communicate their needs, so tell your partner that a healing massage would be a great way to relieve tension, improve blood circulation and relax your mind and body. Tell him or her the places you would like to be massaged the most. Massage is a mutually satisfying way of helping couples to exhibit intimacy for one another.  It is a precious gift that you can give to your partner when they need it most.

#9. Use Love Scents To Lift Your Spirit

Jasmine, rosemary, and sage are said to increase arousal when rubbed on the skin. Applying them to erogenous zones like the neck and to stress-carrying areas like the back, lower tension can stir sensuous feelings. For intimate dryness, be sure to have some lubricant ready to make sexual intercourse more comfortable and reduce friction or discomfort. Lubricants can also enhance masturbation for a smoother, silkier and wetter solo-sexual experience.

#10. Practice Neuroloveology

The brain is the most important sex organ in your body, and its neural pathways are changeable. When the brain taps into a peak pleasurable experience, it doesn’t know whether you are living it or just thinking it, and will release feel-good chemicals that flood your body. So fantasize freely and give yourself erotic pleasure! If you maintain optimistic thinking, the other sexual parts of your being will organize themselves to stay within your cognitive powers. For more sexy neuro-cises, read Neuroloveology.

Erika Jordan’s ‘Advice For Men’ – When Is The Right Time To ‘Kiss The Girl?’

Stay out of the dreaded friend zone by ‘reading’ your date and going in for a kiss at the perfect time! Watch and learn.

Come find me at PlaymatePickup.com My six week course, The Art Of PickUp is available with personalized guidance at Virtual Sexpert.com. Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

Give The Perfect V-Day BJ: Blow Job Tips

Be the Best Blog Job Giver Ever!

Do you know how to train your throat not to gag? Do you know what is even more sensitive than the head of the penis? Well, neither did I until I took Chris and Larkin’s “Blow Jobs & Beyond” workshop at The Pleasure Chest in West Hollywood, California. If you don’t know what to get your man for Valentine’s Day, give him the gift of the perfect blowjob!

Here are some of Chris and Larkin’s best tips…

Give Him a Nice View

Guys are visual creatures. The first step is to dress up for his Valentine’s Day blowjob. Wear lingerie or whatever he finds you sexiest in. Next, find the right position that gives him a view of your favorite assets. If he’s a butt guy, give him a view of your ass by lying on your stomach facing down to service him.

Or, if he’s a boobs guy, have him sit on the bed or stand while you are on your knees in your best push-up bra. “Don’t forget eye contact,” says Chris, who not only teaches classes at The Pleasure Chest but is also founder of GoFraternize.org, which is a community for “guys who like guys.”

I personally like to have my fingernails nice and long and painted because a boyfriend once told me he loved how his cock looked in my hand.

Worship His Cock

Enthusiasm is the most important trait of a great blowjob. You see, men love their penises. They want you love their penises as well. If you love him, love his cock. Tell him it’s beautiful. Tell him you can’t wait to devour it. He needs to feel like it’s not a “job” for you.

“It’s empowering because it’s his prized possession,” says Chris. I could not agree more. And, as Larkin pointed out during the seminar, Samantha on Sex and the City once said, “Maybe you’re on your knees, but you got him by the balls!”

If you truly don’t love sucking dick, well, don’t do anything you don’t want to. But, try to give it a go, girls… especially for Valentine’s Day!

Practice Deep-Throating

Now, this is a new tip to me! If your guy is itching to have you deep-throat him, but your gag reflect just won’t allow it, you can actually train your natural gag reflex to not be so sensitive.

Here’s how: “Every day when you brush your teeth, brush the back of your tongue and go further back each time until you get used it,” advises Larkin.

I’m on Day 7 of Deep Throat Training and it’s going well. I’ll think I’ll be ready by Valentine’s Day! 

Don’t Forget The Frenulum

I always knew the tip of the penis was the most sensitive, but I didn’t know that the frenulum – the V-shaped ridge part of the head also called the “sweet spot” – is specifically the most sensitive. “Using your tongue in different ways on his frenulum. You can use the flat part of your tongue and then the pointy tip of your tongue. You can lick, suck, and blow on it, or try an ice cube,” says Chris.

Give Your Mouth a Rest

You are bound to give a better blowjob if you are comfortable and not stuck doing one monotonous thing over and over. “No one wants to spend 20 minutes straight sucking dick in one position. You want to mix it up by using toys, your mouth, and your hand. 80% of a good blowjob is a good handjob,” says Larkin.

Using an open-ended masturbation sleeve is a fun way to mix it up. This way you can be sucking and licking the tip of his penis while jerking him off with the sleeve. The Pleasure Chest’s Better Blowjob Kit includes a sleeve, a flavorful lube (to either help prevent dry mouth while sucking or to use for an easier handjob), and a vibrating cock ring to give him some extra fun down under.

My favorite BJ product is Doc Johnsons’ GoodHead Wet Head dry mouth spray in sweet strawberry. You’ll never have to worry about not having enough saliva again!

Read Dr. Ava ‘s Give The Perfect V-Day VJ here!

Erika Jordan’s ‘Advice for Men’ – Should You Have Sex on the First Date?

In this video, I share some questions you can ask yourself before you jump into bed on a first date. It’s not about what’s good or bad, right or wrong – it all depends on the individuals involved and how they feel.

Come find me at PlaymatePickup.com My six week course, The Art Of PickUp is available with personalized guidance at Virtual Sexpert.com. Acquire the skills to approach women with confidence and get them to want you!

How To Share Your Kink: Communication Tips

Most of us look for ways to improve our sex lives, even if we’re generally happy with whatever we have going on. Discovering a new kink or fetish often leads to a desire to bring that into your bedroom, but getting what you want can seem difficult. Many couples enjoy a healthy and active sex life but they rarely – if ever – actually discuss their sex lives with each other. So when one partner wants something new, it seems like an impossible task to introduce the idea to the other person.

But getting what you want in bed isn’t really that difficult. These five steps will take you through the process and ease you into introducing the topic to your partner and developing a healthy foundation for your sexual future.

Know What You Want

In many cases, a person will know what they want. Maybe they want to try spanking or having their partner blindfold them. Specific acts are easy to pin down, but sometimes things are a bit trickier. Sometimes a person knows what they want the end result to be, even if they’re not sure how to get there. A woman might see a video on female ejaculation (also known as squirting) and want to try achieving that kind of orgasm. But squirting isn’t something that comes easy to most women and there are very specific sexual techniques partners need to use in order to achieve that goal.

Explore Your Kink On Your Own First

Whatever your kink or sexual goal, do a little research on your own before bringing it up to your partner. This means checking out movies, books, erotic fiction and shopping around for the accessories or supplies you’ll need. Exploring the kink or fetish a bit on your own will make it easier to talk about with your partner. This will also make it easier to speak with confidence and get past any initial awkwardness.

Ask Instead of Ordering

People respond better to being asked something rather than having a demand levied. Don’t tell your partner what you two will be trying out, ask them how they feel about the kink. Share your own interests, listen to what they have to say and encourage each other to have a deep and meaningful conversation about the topic. If you’re interested in trying out different forms of BDSM, discuss how much you’re willing to give or receive along with how comfortable your partner is. Don’t demand the whole nine yards right away – ask your partner about his or her comfort level and use that as a starting point.

Lose Your Inhibitions

Being open and communicating what you want from sex isn’t the time to beat around the bush or speak in riddles. Be frank and up front about what you want before and during sex. Don’t hold back to ask your partner to squeeze more, pinch tighter or change the level of intensity. At the same time, don’t hold back when it comes to telling your partner how good something make you feel. The more information you share with your partner, the better they’ll be able to please you – and the more likely they’ll be to communicate with you.

Stay Open to Spontaneity

Exploring a fetish or new kink means following some sort of plan since you’ve done your research and have things you want to try. But don’t let that process prevent you from being spontaneous with your partner. If you’ve been playing around with pegging and he wants to throw some light whipping into the mix, give it a try if it’s within your comfort levels. There’s no wrong way to explore sexuality with your partner, so don’t be afraid to mix things up and try different combinations. It will keep your sex life interesting, encourage communication between the two of you and will make it easier for you both to have the best sex of your lives.

7 Underwater Sex Questions Answered

Photo by Anastasiya Vragova from Pexels

Many people find the concept of underwater sex to be exciting and it can certainly be a great way to show off your more adventurous side. 

However, regardless of whether you are thinking about sex in the shower or hot tub, or sex in a lake, or a swimming pool, there are things you need to consider and risks you need to be aware of!

In this Q&A piece, I’ll answer some of the most frequent questions people have asked regarding having sex in water. Let’s get right into the questions! 

Table of Contents

1) Is it possible to engage in penetration while submerged in water, or would it wash off (natural or store-bought) lubrication?

One of the single biggest misconceptions about underwater sex is the idea that because everyone involved is soaking wet, there is no need for lubrication. In actual fact, the water can wash away natural vaginal lubricant, resulting in dryness that can make sex difficult and painful. For this reason, it is important to buy artificial lubrication.

In general, lubricants and gels can be separated into two main types: water-based and silicone-based. Although water-based options are popular because they tend to be easier to clean up and less sticky, they are not ideal for underwater sex. Silicone-based lubricants, on the other hand, offer water-resistant qualities, making them a better choice.

2) What about in the shower – would penetration be easier to maneuver in terms of lubrication?

Shower sex can be significantly easier to navigate in terms of lubrication, because the body is not fully submerged in water. This can make penetrative sex easier and less painful without the use of artificial lubricants.

With that being said, the problem with the water from the shower potentially washing away the body’s natural vaginal lubrication may still persist. Therefore, even in the shower, it may still be necessary to purchase a silicone-based lubricant with water-resistant qualities and use this liberally to make penetration easier.

3) What sex acts CAN work in water?

If you are in the shower, you have a wide range of options available, from penetrative sex, to oral sex, and virtually anything else that can be performed standing up, or kneeling down. You will need to be careful in certain positions, as the water does increase the chances of slipping over, but your choices are fairly unrestricted!

For baths, hot tubs and pools, again, penetrative sex is relatively easy to perform, while the use of hands for non-penetrative stimulation is also simple enough. However, oral sex can be more difficult, as unlike in a shower, the water is not constantly draining. Therefore, you will need to think carefully about positioning.

In outdoor environments, such as oceans, lakes and similar bodies of water, options can be more restricted. Try to find a location where you are able to maintain sure footing. Avoid positions where one or both people need to have their head underwater for any length of time, as this introduces an unnecessary level of risk. Penetrative sex and the use of hands for stimulation and foreplay should both be possible. Oral sex may be more tricky in these environments.

You should also know that the use of sex toys is perfectly possible when having underwater sex. However, you need to be sensible about this. It’s crucial to invest in waterproof sex toys that are marketed for their ability to be used in baths, showers, pools, hot tubs, etc. Fortunately, most modern vibrating dildos and other toys are safe and functional for this type of use. 

4) Do condoms still work underwater?

Research on condom effectiveness underwater is still surprisingly limited. Nevertheless, there is no reliable evidence to suggest the effectiveness of latex-based condoms will be adversely affected by the presence of water alone. In general, if you are engaged in underwater sex, use of a latex-based condom is recommended.

With that being said, Durex suggests that there could be an increased risk of condom slippage. The company also speculated that although salt present in sea water should not impact upon the effectiveness of its condoms, it is possible that chemicals in swimming pools could, theoretically, reduce their overall effectiveness.

5) Does the chances of condoms tearing increase if you’re underwater?

There is no evidence that the presence of water alone increases the risk of a condom tearing, at least with conventional latex condoms. However, if you are having sex in a swimming pool, or in a hot tub with chlorine in the system, there is the potential that the durability of the condom could be compromised slightly.

It is important to stress that evidence of this effect is limited. Condom manufacturers are not required to test their products in underwater conditions with chlorine and other chemicals present and studies are few and far between. However, Durex and other brands have anecdotally implied that the risk of tearing could increase in these conditions.

6) Could chlorine and/or ocean or lake water potentially irritate the genitals or cause any sort of medical issue?

Unfortunately, the simple answer to this question is ‘yes’, especially for women. Chlorine can affect the pH balance of the vagina, making yeast infections more likely, while irritation, itching and vulvitis also become more likely. In pools, oceans and lakes, there is also the possibility of bacteria in the water causing issues. This may lead to urinary tract infections, or other less common infections, so you do need to be aware of this heightened risk.

For men, the chances of encountering issues are significantly lower, but the presence of bacteria in ocean or lake water can still lead to problems. Penile irritation is also possible in pools and hot tubs that contain chlorine. If you or your partner do experience irritation, it is best to stop immediately and reconsider your approach.

7) Are there any other considerations someone should have regarding sex in water?

It is important to remember that water-based sex of any kind will introduce some safety hazards, so you and your partner do need to take care. If you are having sex in the bath or shower, be aware of the potential for slipping and falling. 

Handrails can be one way to reduce the dangers in this particular area. If you are in a pool, lake or the sea, have respect for the water and remember that there is a drowning hazard that needs to be taken seriously.

The main other thing to be aware of is the law. While sex in a public place can be a turn-on, and while introducing water adds a whole extra element of fun, be mindful of legal issues that could arise if you are caught in the act. For similar reasons, you should also avoid having sex in someone else’s private swimming pool without permission.

“Male Pelvic Fitness” Book Review

With his new book Male Pelvic Fitness, renowned urologist Dr. Andrew Siegel is on a mission to teach men about the “hidden jewels” of the pelvis, the muscles that work with the male sexual organs to create optimal sexual performance. A typical man’s workout at the gym does not involve penis exercises, but that’s exactly what the doctor orders in this book.

His main well-documented thesis is that by increasing the strength, tone and condition of the pelvic floor muscles, a man can expect to solve many pelvic health issues from erectile dysfunction to prostate issues. Detailed anatomical illustrations show you exactly what’s going on in the male pelvic region, including all the arteries, veins and ligaments involved in a rock hard erection, but the book is more than just a biology lesson.

Dr. Siegel has a wealth of practical knowledge to bring to the table from his life-long practice treating men with countless issues like urinary incontinence, prostate problems, premature ejaculation and many more.

And he’s also got a sense of humor. Expect to find the unexpected, like learning about the Walibri tribe of central Australia who shake penises instead of hands as a greeting. “Don’t try this at work,” he warns. It was also fun to read the origin of penis nicknames like ‘schlong,’ ‘willy,’ ‘wiener,’ and ‘pud,’ which is the short form of Pudendum.

When it comes to sexual health, so many questions can go unanswered due to shyness or just a lack of proper communication with one’s doctor. This book gives a full practical guide to men’s sexual health covering topics that some men may not bring up at the doctor’s office, like how anti-depressants affect a man’s sexual performance.

My favorite three chapters include Marvel’s Of The Penis, Male Sexual Dysfunction and Muscles of Love! This is knowledge every man and woman needs to know in order to understand male sexual health and pleasure. Couples should read these chapters together as part of foreplay or even afterplay! And knowing that it’s never to late to improve your sexual health by doing some pelvic floor muscle exercises should be empowering to men. There is even a program called, Private Gym that comes with a DVD, a penis exerciser and this book, so buy it for yourself or give it as a gift and it will be one of the most memorable and valuable gifts ever!

Dr. Siegel’s reader-friendly format keeps you focused on what’s important, with the bolded Who Knew? beside interesting facts (like little-known Viagra side effects) and Bottom Line to call out summary statements that get to the point. There’s also a great interview with Pilates expert Catherine Byron who outlines a 10-step pelvic strengthening Pilates routine.

I recommend the book to all men as a fantastic primer in penis health, and the Private Gym for giving penis exercises a try.