Sunday, June 25, 2017
Authors Posts by Anka Radakovich

Anka Radakovich

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Anka Radakovich is a legendary Sex Columnist, Sex Educator, Sexologist, Screenwriter, and Author of the new book THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, PART 2, Tales from New York to Hollywood. http://www.amazon.com/The-Wild-Girls-Club-Part/dp/0990462129 THE WILD GIRLS CLUB, Part 2 is her third book. Her first two books The Wild Girls Club; Tales from below the Belt, and Sexplorations; Journeys to the Erogenous Frontier were both published by Crown/Random House. She was the Sex Columnist for DETAILS Magazine for 9 years and is currently a Sex Columnist for BRITISH GQ. Her writing has appeared in dozens of magazines including Marie Claire, Women’s Health, Men’s Health, Harper’s Bazaar, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Men's Journal, Seventeen, Glamour, and Maxim. She has appeared on numerous television shows including 8 appearances with Conan O’Brien. She was a Jeopardy question under the category “Men’s Mags.” As a Sex Educator and Sexologist, she is a college lecturer at Universities throughout the country who offers her unique brand of sex education. She lives in New York City. Follow her on Twitter @ankarad. @ankarad www.ankagirl.com

Want Better Sex? Just Breathe.

Two of the biggest sexual issues sex therapists hear about is premature ejaculation for men and trouble reaching orgasm for women. It seems that while women are trying to having an orgasm men are trying not to.

The good news is that for every sexual “problem” there is a solution. To the rescue: breathing techniques. By controlling your breathing you can control your orgasms. Controlled breathing will also make your orgasms more intense.

Try a few of these techniques for general stress reduction and more relaxed orgasms.

1. Breathe through your nose. Most people breathe through their mouths which causes shallow breathing. Take a deep breath and hold it for a few seconds then exhale slowly. By deliberately doing this, your breathing slows down and you will feel more relaxed. Do this five times. As you do it each time, try holding your breath longer and exhaling slower. Try doing this every day. Even if you’re not focusing on your orgasms, you’re learning how to relax for when you do want to control your orgasms. You can even do this at your desk or at work. Nobody has to know you are practicing your orgasmic breathing techniques!

2. Coordinate your breathing with your lover. Try taking deep breaths with your honey as you lie next to them as you spoon. Even if it seems ridiculous, at least you are laughing together. Breathing together will make you feel closer.

3. Vary your breath. Close your eyes and slowly inhale, taking deep breaths every 30 seconds. For men who want to delay the ‘ol premature ejaculation, keep your eyes closed, breath deeply and slowly, and exhale through your nose. You want to consciously control your ejaculation. This slows down the build-up of sexual tension and is a Tantric sex technique. Doing this will build up a “better” orgasm for later.

4. For men, once you’re actually thrusting, exhale deeply as you thrust inside. Inhale deeply as you pull out. Try to synchronize your breathing with your partner’s. Sort of like synchronized swimming except that you are matching your inhales and exhales. Your/his boner will stay erect longer as he “pushes back” his orgasm.

5. For women, as you feel like you may be approaching an orgasm, close your eyes and breathe deeply. It’s the same technique that yoga instructors use when they tell you to inhale and then “breathe into” your pelvis, which sends the breath down into your sweet spot as you exhale. Breathe “into” an orgasm, by focusing on your breathing rather than on your orgasm.

 

A Fidget Spinner For Your Butt

Fidget Spinners, the new toy craze that has has swept the nation, has trickled down… to the butt. The toy, originally invented for people with ADHD and autism, helps people to relax by creating over stimulation and focus. Now, an etsy entrepreneur  has invented a sexy version of the spinner to help people’s butts relax.

“Here’s to help keep that A$$ focused,” she says. “That’s right friends, help combat ADHD and get stuff done with your very own spinning booty toy. Social anxiety? Easily distracted? This is sure to help keep you focused in bed.”

Called GlowFyourself, the inventor says you can “Be the talk of every party, become the rectal tilt a whirl you’ve dreamt of, legitimately identify as that Apache attack helicopter you’ve always known you really where!”

“Imagine the look on coworkers faces as they watch your stress levels bottom out, this toy could be the thing that keeps you cool and collected, any time your stressed, just sit and spin!”

Um, does that mean its okay to use the thing at work?

The butt plus comes in three sizes, but our interpretation is “small, medium, and omg my ass is killing me.”

The company also offers a shit load of other butt plugs, including a “mood ring” butt plug for “50 shades of pleasure,” $50.00, or a $35.00 gifty Buddha butt plug key chain chain for some “what goes around comes around and then goes up the butt” kind of thing.

The fun and fearless butt plug collection was created by Portland designer and artist Jesse Lindsay, who says “This is the story of a few brave souls, willing to risk it all, their jobs, their spouses..their very lives…to make awesome stuff, for your butthole…

In addition to these things helping you “get shit done,” they are funny gifts for anyone too shy to try themselves.

Play with your fidget while it plays with your butt. Stainless steel. $35.00.

Then there’s the “magic 8 ball butt plug, that is “Great for birthdays, baby showers, convincing your friends you have magic powers, gag gifts, help with making REALLY important decisions, gambling, finding Gary Bucey, and probably all kinds of other crap!”

Feel the magic for $45.00.

And for those who love Jesus, there is the “Jesus Christ, out lord, butt plug and nipple rings. Feel his face every time you sit down, in church, the car, even at work. “Jesus has returned to where the sun doth not shine.”

Feel Jesus for $45.00.

Are RompHims Sexy?

This summer is the “Summer of the RompHim.” Dudes are now donning the male version of the super cute and playful Romper for girls. But rompers for men look so goofy, dorky, and ridiculous that at first glance you may not be able to decide if they are sexy. RompHims look like a cross between a UPS or gas station uniform, pajamas, Garanimals, and a cut-off bathrobe.

All I can say at this point is it depends on who is wearing it. And they make me laugh. The pastel colors; pink, yellow, blue, etc. are something a 90 year-old in Florida would wear and something I’m going to have to get used to. And I would probably be mortified if my date showed up to take me out and he was wearing a yellow RompHim that made him look like a lemon meringue pie with shorts. But I’m open minded and could get used to them.

The gender neutral clothing item was developed by a bunch of start-up bros (and one girl), business students at Northwestern University in Chicago who put up a Kickstarter page. The goal was to raise $10,000 to make some rompers $358,804. later, the RompHim is this summer’s fashion phenomenon.

“We were sitting around over drinks one evening and to to talking about the men’s clothing options out there,” states their Kickstarter site. “Everything was either too corporate, too fratty, too runway. Why wasn’t there anything out there that allowed guys to be more stylish and fun without sacrificing comfort?” Enter the romper for big boys.

RompHims got so hot so fast that other companies began knocking them off, offering their own sexier, less expensive versions.  Yandy.com who specialize in lingerie, underwear, swimsuits, and costumes, has “evolved the look into the bedroom.” Their upcoming line of “sleepwear rompers” for him and her actually looks sexy. Their collection of terry clothed rompers retails for $30.00.

Yandy.com‘s sexy his and her rompers for bedroom romps.

Meanwhile, RompHim says “We’ve revolutionized men’s fashion. Concerts? Rooftops? Beach days? Pool parties? Leisurely strolls? Bar patios?” they ask. It’s your new favorite summer outfit. We promise that once you put it on you won’t want to take it off.”

Anyone going to their high school reunion this summer?

And for anyone who has ever worn a romper, they have solved the how to go to the bathroom in one problem. “While our female friends love their rompers,” they say, the biggest complaint we heard from them is the “getting fully undressed to pee thing.” The sturdy metal zipper simplifies the problem.”

Hot or not? You decide.

Sean Connery as Bond. James Romphim Bond.

June Is Men’s Health Month

Men’s Health Month was founded with the goal of “educating the public about what can be done to improve the state of men’s health.” According to the CDC, “The important but often neglected issue is men’s sexual health.”

This male centric week brings awareness to everything from to ED (erectile dysfunction) to to PME (premature ejaculation), which BTW can be improved immensely so everyone can have OMG sex!

The idea behind Men’s Health Month is to “heighten the awareness of preventable health problems and encourage early detection and treatment of disease among men. This month gives health care providers, public policy makers, and the media an opportunity to encourage men and boys to seek regular medical advice and early treatment for disease and injury.” In other words, men need to go to the doctor regularly to have their “boys” checked up on. The prostate and the testicles are the two things men should have tested. (That’s three things actually.)

 

According to the 2017 SKYN Condoms Millennial Sex Survey 57% of male millennials experience some type of sexual issue, with the two most common being premature ejaculation (25%) and loss of erection (17%) known as “ED” (erectile dysfunction.) Other condom studies have founded that the use of condoms can help premature ejaculation.

While these two situations can be helped immensely by going to a urologist and/or a sex therapist, most men–especially younger guys, don’t think of going to either. For older men over 40, 40% of men have erectile dysfunction of some sort, and 50% of men over 50 have it, increasing 10% each decade. Today there is a growing (and showing) new field among urologists who now specialize in “sexual medicine.” There are SO many treatments available that any man in his 80’s should be able to have the boner of an 18-year year old. Something to look forward to.

 
 Men of the world keepin’ it up and stylin’ in Dolce & Gabbana suits.

In regard to safer sex, the good news is that “Condom users are more sexually satisfied, have more sex, feel more confident in bed, and last longer during sex than non-condom users.” The CDC urges men to protect themselves and get tested! On their site you can plug in your zip code and find a free clinic near you.

Anchored by a Congressional health education program, Men’s Health Month is celebrated across the country with free health screenings, health fairs, media appearances, and other health education and outreach activities. Check it out at menshealthmonth.org.

 

75 Years Of Sexy Wonder Woman Costumes (And Saving The Planet)

Since Wonder Woman’s comic book debut in the 1940’s, her costume has never stopped being super sexy. From her first get-up in 1941; a bustier and star spangled panties, to her mini dress and blue tights in 1971, to her current superhero Amazonian look, she still rules the planet, kicks ass, and always looks hot. Wonder Woman pulled in over $100 million at the box office during its opening weekend. Why? Two words: girl power.

William Moulton Marston, the creator of Wonder Woman, was a Psychologist who explained that the character was intended “to set up a standard of strong, free, courageous womanhood; and to combat the idea that women are inferior to men.” After her comic book debut in 1941, in 1942 Wonder Woman was allowed to join the “Justice League”, an all male group of superheroes.

Wonder Woman in 1942.

According to The LA Times, “A syndicated Wonder Woman newspaper comic strip debuted in 1944. During this time Marston hired his student, Joye Hummel, as an assistant to help him write Wonder Woman comic-book scripts between 1944-77. All of the stories remained credited to “Charles Moulton.”

In 1952, “in response to allegations of “indecent” themes and concerns about how comic books contributed to juvenile delinquency,” the Comics Magazine Association of America created a Comics Code Authority for publishers to police their own content. The industry’s self-censorship, in addition to Marston’s death, saw Wonder Woman stories change to being less vocal in her feminism and more focused on her romances with Steve Trevor, Merman and Birdman.”

In 1956, the “Golden Age of comics began and Wonder Woman acquired new superhero powers, including flight. In 1972, Wonder Woman reclaimed her feminist roots when Gloria Steinem decided to place the superhero (in costume) on the cover of the very first issue of Ms. Magazine.  This spotlight helped put the character on a path to reclaim her powers (and her costume). Wonder Woman was also featured on the cover of the magazine’s 35th and 40th anniversary issues.

The first “Wonder Woman” television movie actually starred Cathy Lee Crosby as Diana Prince, but the series never materialized.

Lynda Carter made her first appearance as Wonder Woman in the made-for-TV film “The New Original Wonder Woman.” The film led to the TV series, which premiered on April 21, 1976.

Wonder Woman returned to the animated TV world in “Justice League,” which was part of the DC Animated Universe that launched with 1992’s “Batman: The Animated Series.” Justice League” focused on the team consisting of Wonder Woman, Batman, Superman, Green Lantern.

According to entertainment reporter Tracy Brown, “In 2013 Gal Gadot debuted as Wonder Woman in “Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice.” The film grossed over $873 million worldwide. Lynda Carter, Gal Gadot and director Patty Jenkins attended the U.N. when Wonder Woman was declared honorary ambassador for the empowerment of women and girls at a ceremony held at the U.N. headquarters in New York.”

In June, “Wonder Woman” hit theaters, becoming the first female-led film in the modern superhero movie renaissance. The movie grossed over $100 million in the U.S. and $100 million overseas. In the first weekend.

Yandy.com, who specializes in sexy costumes, sexy lingerie, and sexy “lingerie costumes,” has created a line of sexy Wonder Woman wear from full-on cosplay costumes to a Wonder Woman inspired pajama romper. We’re buying the the retro number with red cape for our next superhero roleplaying session in the boudoir. Plus, if we order it now, we’re good to go months ahead of Halloween, when we can kick some more ass.

“Take down the forces of evil in this Warrior Princess costume,” Yandy says about their “high neck romper with a gold paneled neckline, red cups, blue bottom with white stars and a cheeky cut back, matching gold headband, and  gold rope.”$39.95. And the white go-go boots. We want. Only $47.95.

Wonder Woman  in 1971.

The Glamorous Wonderlady Costume features a red sequin cropped corset with underwire cups, clear spaghetti straps to hold up the girls, blue star studded leggings, gold wrist cuffs with red stars, headband, and gold lasso for rounding up troublemakers. $63.95.

Today’s Amazonian inspired “Warrior Woman” costume.

“Save the day in this four-piece, Deluxe Vintage Warrior Woman costume featuring a burgundy corset with sweetheart neckline, gold studded trim, lace-up back, blue wet look panel skirt with gold studded band, gold rope, star detail, matching booty shorts and gold studded head band.” $95.95. Boots and wrist cuffs also available at Yandy.

What Cities Are Having The Most Sex?

Ever wonder what cities are having the most sex? The folks at Laveeza, the “alternative android app for erotica” have. The massive, pulsating study investigated the sex habits of over 450,000 people in over 200 countries. The study ranked major cities globally on their “sex positivity,” which they defined as “having or promoting an open, tolerant, or progressive attitude toward sex and sexuality.” They ranked the top 10 cities in the world; so you can book your tickets now and hook up with sexy foreigners asap.

The “sexiest cities” were:

1.) Paris, France,

2.) Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

3.) London, England

4.) Los Angeles, California

5.) Berlin, Germany

6.) New York, New York

7.) Sao Paulo, Brazil

8.) Las Vegas, Nevada

9.) Ibiza, Spain

10.) Amsterdam, Holland

Cities were ranked in 10 different categories, including how “sexually active” their residents were, much porn they consumed, the number of adult entertainment listings, sex toy ownership, and the town’s “swinger score.”

How “sexually experimental” residents of each city were resulted in Rio de Janeiro coming in first (10%), Los Angeles at 99%, and Sao Paulo at 98%. Consumption of porn was the highest in Los Angeles (10.0%) and New York City (9.9%) with the other 8 cities reporting low porn watching scores due to the fact they that are actually having sex with real life partners.

Data was collected from various preexisting studies including sex studies and health/sex investigations from the departments of health in different countries. “We also believe that to be truly sexually liberated, a city needs to have good access to modern contraception, Lazeeva said, as well as “a positive attitude to the LGBT community and equal rights for everyone.” In the “LGBT friendliness” score, London ranked number one (10%), Paris number two (9.7%), and Rio number three at 9.4%.

Berlin came in first as the biggest swingers, with a score of 10%. They were followed by libertine Paris at 9.9% and Las Vegas at 9.8%. Paris and Las Vegas also ranked the highest in adult entertainment venues.

In regard to what genre of porn people watch in different cities, “French Maman” porn was big in Paris (amateur “mature porn”) at 86.5%, “ebony porn” in Brazil at 86.1%, “lesbian porn” in London at 84%, “massage porn” in Los Angeles at 80.9%, “MILF porn” in Berlin at 80%, massage porn again in New York City at 79%, lesbian in Las Vegas at 75%, “smoking porn” in Ibiza at 74%, and “Arab porn” in Amsterdam at 73.6%.

And what about “sexual satisfaction”? Brazilians came in first, followed by Los Angelenos, who are enjoying their happy endings.

Better Sleep = Better Sex

A new study says that better sleep equals better sex! The study concluded that “Sleep problems can interfere with a woman’s level of sexual satisfaction.” The gigantic study, entitled “Better Sleep Can Lead To Better Sex,” analyzed data from a whopping 93,668 women 50-79 who were enrolled in the Women’s Health Initiative Observational StudyThe groundbreaking study was formed to “change the way health care providers  prevent and treat some of the major diseases impacting postmenopausal women.” Thanks to cool studies like this, I look forward to fornicating when I’m 79.

The study found that “short sleep duration (defined as fewer than 7 to 8 hours per night) was associated with lower odds of sexual satisfaction. Of the participants, 56% reported being somewhat or very satisfied with their current sexual activity, and 52% reported partnered sexual activity within the last year. Insomnia prevalence was 31%.”

“Women and healthcare providers need to recognize the link between inadequate sleep and their effects on sexual satisfaction,” says Dr. JoAnn Pinkerton, NAMS executive director. “There are effective treatment options to help with sleep disruption and sexual satisfaction, including hormone therapy, which this study confirmed to be effective at menopause for symptomatic women.” Increasing your exercise as you age, including weight lifting and yoga, is also proven to be great sleep enhancer.

Hellomd.com, a medical marijuana community site that promotes the medical and therapeutic qualities of cannabis, reports that prescription sleep medication use–as well as pain medication use, has been reduced by 25% in states with medical marijuana patients. “We believe that quality medical advice from trained professionals is important, and we know that as more people begin to discover the healing powers of cannabis that they will seek to learn and share.” Many sex therapists now recommend “micro dosing” marijuana as not only a sleep aid but as a sexual, sensual enhancement. The magical plant reduces stress, helps you fall asleep, and relaxes you. Relaxed sex = better sex.

Another study from 2015 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that the same equation: more sleep = more sex, was also was true for college aged students. Students in the study said they felt hornier with each hour of extra sleep they had. They also said the more they slept the night before, the more they felt interested in sexy time the next day. The more you sleep the more you want sex, the better you feel, and the more you want to feel someone.

 

 

 

What Are The Dating App Habits Of College Students?

If you want to look at the future of any dating trend, just look at the mating habits of college students. A revealing study of 3,500 students was conducted by Abodo, a Madison, Wisconsin apartment rental site that caters to college students. The survey asked which apps they preferred? Were they looking for love or just a hook up? What have their experiences been like? The most surprising finding: instead of meeting through a dating app, 95% of students secretly preferred to meet IRL/in real life! (Yet they spend hours on dating apps.)

When it comes to dating apps that people secretly hate but secretly use everyday, the most used dating app was Tinder, coming in at 84% of college students surveyed. Bumble, the app where women make the first approach, came in second, followed by OkCupid and Match. Grindr came in at 4%, used the most by gay and bi guys.

“Interestingly,” noted the study “Hinge, which bills itself as “The Relationship App” and markets itself as a way out of “casual dating,” was the least-favored app on our list, with only 1.8% of respondents claiming it as their way of finding digital dates.”

“Most typically,” said the study, for 34.1% of surveyed female college students, entertainment is the #1 motivating force to use dating apps. The same is true for 29.7% of males. Of Tinder users, 34.4% of said entertainment was their primary motivator, but they weren’t the only ones: Bumble (27.1%) and Grindr (23.3%) users also ranked it as their main reason,” said the study. Let’s face it, looking at people on Tinder is entertaining. Especially when you discover your married neighbor who lives down the street is on there.

“In a more heartwarming turn,” says the study “more people overall are using the apps to find love (11.5%) than to find hookups (8.8%). (Among men, however, hookups are still the third-most popular reason for using the apps, with 14.8% choosing them as their primary reason.) For the romantics seeking love via phone screen, Match, one of the oldest in the game, is still the top site, though OkCupid and Coffee Meets Bagel users also rated love as their primary goal. Users of Grindr — another app highly linked to hookup culture — rated love as their #2 reason, less than a percentage point ahead of hookups.”

The study noted the suckiest part of using dating apps, and found that more than a quarter of all dating app users — 35.5% of women and 14.1% of men — have experienced harassment. According to the study “Grindr is the only app to have more than half of its surveyed users (51%) report harassment. OkCupid saw the next-most, with 40%, perhaps due to the largely unrestricted messaging capabilities — on Tinder, for example, you must “match” with someone before you can begin a conversation, which could explain why the platform has the lowest incidence of harassment (26%) in our surveyed students. However, Bumble, which uses a similar functionality but requires the woman to send the first message, had 32% of its surveyed users report having experienced harassment. Coffee Meets Bagel is only slightly behind Tinder, with 27%, and Match falls in the middle of the pack with 30%.” You know the “creepy guy on the dating app” thing is getting out of control when you have to block 1/3 of the guys using it.

And the good news? The study concluded that the use of dating apps, like dating itself is, well, complicated. “According to our data, concluded the study “more and more college-aged Millennials are downloading dating apps, and the stigma of finding love online — long a deterrent — has mostly vanished. There are options for nearly every lifestyle and preference, from hookups to true love. And yet even as user numbers spike, over 95% of our surveyed students still prefer to meet potential partners offline. When it comes to love, it appears we’re still a bunch of romantics.”

 

Now Trending: Dating For The Tattooed

The tattoo trend will never end! People continue to tattoo every part of their bodies; including their boobs, their butts, and even their penises! So what better way to meet people than through your sexy tattoos?

Chris Potts, who runs the dating website inked2gether says he created the site for “tattoo enthusiasts” to meet each other. (He also notes that dating site Farmer’s Only was not working for him.) The site, which started locally in Waynesboro, Pennsylvania, has grown worldwide, with membership reaching to England and Japan, “where tattoos are big,” he says. In America he says, “Tattooing is a big culture.”

So what do tattooed people have in common? “A lot of tattooed people are very open sexually and are not afraid to show skin,” he says. “As they say, get tattooed or die naked. Getting wild and crazy is our life. Many of us are exhibitionists.”

And besides dating sites, how do tattooed people meet other tattooed people?
“You just walk up to someone and say “I like your tattoo,” he says. “Then they will tell you a story about it. Everyone has a story it. And some people have multiple tattoos.” He also recommends going to tattoo conventions where everyone is friendly, “free spirited,” and often single and ready to mingle.

Trend wise, what is sexy in the tattoo world? “Tramp stamps on the lower back are out,” he says. You don’t see people getting those anymore. They’d rather get a whole back piece instead.” So what’s in? “Tattoos at the back of the neck are sexy for both men and women, tattoos at the back of the ear, inside the wrist, and on the feet,” he says. We are also seeing more women getting small tattoos in the pelvic region or on the side of the hip or thigh. Then there is the under the boob tattoo known as a “chandelier. “Those are sexy,” he says.

“Many women who are breast cancer survivors with mastectomies have nipples tattooed onto their reconstructed breasts, which is very cool,” says co-creator of inked2gether Jim Miller. (This is the final procedure recommended by plastic surgeons.) “And they look very real and natural. Here’s a case where tattoos can improve people’s lives.”

“And we even see men getting tattoos on their penises,” says Potts, “like a little ladybug on the tip, or a “your name here” somewhere on the thing.” But that’s just gotta, that just has to hurt.”

photo by @baonguioxamhinh

Harvard Sex Study Says Young Women Feel Degraded And Sexually Harassed

It’s a myth that young women 18-25 are hooking up like crazy, says a new Harvard Study.

The new report, called “The Talk: How Adults Can Promote Young People’s Healthy Relationships and Prevent Misogyny and Sexual Harassment”, found that girls are so turned off by disrespectful behavior from boys that they don’t want to hook up!

“Making caring common” is a brilliant project of the Harvard Graduate School of Education that methodically interviewed over 3,000 high school and college students about their sexual experiences.

“Parents and other adults often fret a great deal about the “hook-up culture,” says the study, “But that focus ignores two far more pervasive troubles related to young people’s romantic and sexual experiences. The first is that we as a society are failing to prepare young people for perhaps the most important thing they will do in life—learn how to love and develop caring, healthy romantic relationships. Second, most adults appear to be doing shockingly little to prevent or effectively address pervasive misogyny and sexual harassment among teens and young adults—problems that can infect both romantic relationships and many other areas of young people’s lives.”

The key findings are:

–“Teens and adults tend to greatly overestimate the size of the “hook-up culture” and these misconceptions can be detrimental to young people.” (“This overestimation can make many teens and young adults feel embarrassed or ashamed because they believe that they are not adhering to the norms of their peers. It can also pressure them to engage in sex when they are not interested or ready.”)

— “Large numbers of teens and young adults are unprepared for caring, lasting romantic relationships and are anxious about developing them.” So what exactly do 18-25 year-olds want to know? (Specifically “how to have a more mature relationship” (38%), “how to deal with breakups”(36%), “how to avoid getting hurt in a relationship” (34%), and “how to begin a relationship” (27%). 65% of respondents to our survey of 18 to 25-year-olds wished that they had received guidance on some emotional aspect of romantic relationships in a health or sex education class at school.”)

We are in desperate need of sex education in this country.

–“Misogyny and sexual harassment appear to be pervasive among young people and certain forms of gender based degradation may be increasing, yet a significant majority of parents do not appear to be talking about it.”

(“87% percent of women reported having experienced at least one of the following during their lifetime: being catcalled (55%), touched without permission by a stranger (41%), insulted with sexualized words (e.g., slut, bitch, ho) by a man (47%), insulted with sexualized words by a woman (42%), having a stranger say something sexual to them (52%), and having a stranger tell them they were “hot” (61%). Yet 76% of respondents to this survey had never had a conversation with their parents about how to avoid sexually harassing others”).

–“Many young people don’t see certain types of gender-based degradation and subordination as problems in our society.”

(“About 58% of respondents had never had a conversation with their parents about the importance of “being a caring and respectful sexual partner.”)

–“Research shows that rates of sexual assault among young people are high. But our research suggests that a majority of parents and educators aren’t discussing with young people basic issues related to consent.”

(“Most of the respondents to our survey of 18 to 25-year-olds had never spoken with their parents about “being sure your partner wants to have sex and is comfortable doing so before having sex”(61%), assuring your “own comfort before engaging in sex” (49%), the “importance of not pressuring someone to have sex with you”(56%), the “importance of not continuing to ask someone to have sex after they have said no” (62%), or the “importance of not having sex with someone who is too intoxicated or impaired to make a decision about sex” (57%).”

THE GOOD NEWS

This awesome study has brought awareness to these sexual issues, and the study’s authors have made some recommendations going forward. The study concluded that “A high percentage of people 18-25 want guidance.” Specifically they say that adults should answer these questions from their kids: “What’s the difference between attraction, infatuation, and love? How can we be more attracted to people the less interested they are in us? Why can we be attracted to people who are unhealthy for us? How do you know if you’re “in love?” Why and how can romantic relationships become deeply meaningful and gratifying? How do they contribute to our lives?”

Also, they recommend that parents of young men “engage in discussions about romantic and sexual relationships, misogyny and harassment, and address ethical questions about their obligation to treat others with respect.”

Instead of encouraging the “destructive” nature of the hook up culture, where “the bros over ho’s” mentality is rampant, the study says, “the recommendation is that we all focus on treating each other with mutual respect.”

The study concludes with the hope that everyone will continue “The Talk.”

“We all need to talk more about romantic love.”