If you have an interest in learning and enjoying personal, recreational erotic hypnosis – here are a number of important points for beginners to consider right from the start.
Make sure you learn some basic hypnosis techniques before trying anything erotic. Learn how to get your subject to relax (you can read a progressive relaxation script from a hypnosis book); learn how to deliver simple, positive instructions in the present tense; and learn how to “emerge” your subject from hypnosis. (They will come out of it by themselves, but emerging is a courtesy that provides closure and should never be neglected.)
You’ll want to have clear, careful conversations with you partner about what is accepted, expected, and unacceptable in a session.
Some erotic hypnotist couples like to eroticize and create a fantasy “forbidden” “mind control” experience of hypnosis. In this way, the myths of hypnosis are enacted in a mutually agreed upon fantasy and made momentarily, erotically “true.” Even so, remember that these myths are just that – and that any person can emerge from the fantasy intact.
Rules For Erotic Hypnosis
1) Always stick with negotiated agreements. Be clear about hard and soft boundaries regarding sensations, subject matter, fantasy play, and anything else you need to be comfortable and safe.
2) Build negotiated agreements right into hypnosis script.
3) Use a hypnosis script, including all elements of session. If you are enacting the hypnotist role, let your hypnotic subject read it first and be open to suggestions for changing the script. If you are the subject, remember you can emerge from hypnosis at any time, on your own, if something is not right.
4) Do several hypnosis sessions which are not sexual in nature first, to build trust and confidence (your own and your partner’s).
5) Be aware of “triggers” from sex abuse history. Strongly reconsider using erotic hypnosis in this case. Consult a licensed sex therapist to talk over this kind of erotic play.
6) Other contraindications: if undergoing psychiatric treatment or taking psycho-active meds (such as anti-depressants); if relationship is in trouble – the level of trust between partners may not be enough; avoid hypnosis during times of major upheaval and change.
7) Have a plan for abreactions. Abreactions are (usually rare) times when a person may be upset by subconscious material. Practice calming breath techniques in advance or learn and use EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping on accupressure points).
You can also create a scripted response for calming, helping.
8) Decide on your safe words in advance (red, yellow, green can work well) and create an ideomotor response (gesture, hand signal) that can also indicate “stop.”
9) If you’re into kinky play, don’t mix hypnosis and real-life bondage – use imaginary, “hypnotic” ropes instead. Never leave your hypnotized subject alone. Also use the highest standards for physical, mental, and emotional safety – agreed upon with your partner.
10) Don’t breach trust by giving suggestions to “change” partner. Always use positive language, encouragement.
11) If you are enacting the hypnotist role, stay attentive and focused. Remember that you, too, might get a little “trancey” so using scripts can help you stay present.