Wednesday, June 20, 2018
Authors Posts by Dr. Amy Marsh

Dr. Amy Marsh

Amy Marsh is a board certified clinical sexologist, an AASECT-certified sex counselor, a certified hypnotist and hypnosis instructor. She holds Doctor of Education in Human Sexuality (EdD) and Doctor of Human Sexuality (DHS) degrees from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco. She is a member of the advisory board of the American College of Sexologists. She is published online in the Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality and the WriteSex blog. She was a contributor to The Cultural Encyclopedia of the Penis, and to an anthology of essays by mothers of transgender children. She wrote a year's worth of weekly "Love's Outer Limits" sex columns for Carnal Nation. The first collection is published as an ebook, Sex Squicks. She has presented at several conferences. Her national television appearances include Good Morning America, The Tyra Banks Show, and two episodes of National Geographic Taboo. She is currently working on a how-to book about erotic hypnosis. She is an online instructor at Sex Coach U and Creative Sexuality Education Corporation and has recently founded the Intimate Hypnosis Training Center. As a former associate professor of sexology at IASHS, Dr. Marsh created and taught a 150-hour course on hypnosis for sex problems. Dr. Marsh has a private sexology and hypnotism practice in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Erotic Hypnosis: Safety & Consent Tips


If you have an interest in learning and enjoying personal, recreational erotic hypnosis – here are a number of important points for beginners to consider right from the start.

Make sure you learn some basic hypnosis techniques before trying anything erotic. Learn how to get your subject to relax (you can read a progressive relaxation script from a hypnosis book); learn how to deliver simple, positive instructions in the present tense; and learn how to “emerge” your subject from hypnosis. (They will come out of it by themselves, but emerging is a courtesy that provides closure and should never be neglected.)

You’ll want to have clear, careful conversations with you partner about what is accepted, expected, and unacceptable in a session.

Some erotic hypnotist couples like to eroticize and create a fantasy “forbidden” “mind control” experience of hypnosis. In this way, the myths of hypnosis are enacted in a mutually agreed upon fantasy and made momentarily, erotically “true.” Even so, remember that these myths are just that – and that any person can emerge from the fantasy intact.

Rules For Erotic Hypnosis

1) Always stick with negotiated agreements. Be clear about hard and soft boundaries regarding sensations, subject matter, fantasy play, and anything else you need to be comfortable and safe.

2) Build negotiated agreements right into hypnosis script.

3) Use a hypnosis script, including all elements of session. If you are enacting the hypnotist role, let your hypnotic subject read it first and be open to suggestions for changing the script. If you are the subject, remember you can emerge from hypnosis at any time, on your own, if something is not right.

4) Do several hypnosis sessions which are not sexual in nature first, to build trust and confidence (your own and your partner’s).

5) Be aware of “triggers” from sex abuse history. Strongly reconsider using erotic hypnosis in this case. Consult a licensed sex therapist to talk over this kind of erotic play.

6) Other contraindications: if undergoing psychiatric treatment or taking psycho-active meds (such as anti-depressants); if relationship is in trouble – the level of trust between partners may not be enough; avoid hypnosis during times of major upheaval and change.

7) Have a plan for abreactions. Abreactions are (usually rare) times when a person may be upset by subconscious material. Practice calming breath techniques in advance or learn and use EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping on accupressure points).

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You can also create a scripted response for calming, helping.

8) Decide on your safe words in advance (red, yellow, green can work well) and create an ideomotor response (gesture, hand signal) that can also indicate “stop.”

9) If you’re into kinky play, don’t mix hypnosis and real-life bondage – use imaginary, “hypnotic” ropes instead. Never leave your hypnotized subject alone. Also use the highest standards for physical, mental, and emotional safety – agreed upon with your partner.

10) Don’t breach trust by giving suggestions to “change” partner. Always use positive language, encouragement.

11) If you are enacting the hypnotist role, stay attentive and focused. Remember that you, too, might get a little “trancey” so using scripts can help you stay present.

Erotic Hypnosis – Yes, You CAN Try This at Home!

Imagine coming home from stressful day at work and settling into a comfortable chair. You turn off your cell phone. Your partner brings you a glass of water and invites you to close your eyes and breathe deeply. As you drop deeper into your breath, you begin to relax, allowing yourself to go deeper. Your mind opens to the soothing words you hear from your partner: loving words of appreciation, support, and encouragement. Your imagination opens to receive positive suggestions for your self-esteem and happiness. After five minutes, you open your eyes and smile at your partner – alert and refreshed. You feel confident in your emotional bond, and now happily to return the favor. You feel so close.

Later, at night, you have a desire to be intimate, but your partner seems tired or on edge. You ask your partner to close his or her eyes, and begin to breathe through the perineum (also known as the location of the oh-so-sexy root chakra). As your partner breathes and relaxes, and draws vibrant, vital energy through the perineum and up into the spine and the rest of the body, you notice that he or she is becoming aroused. You offer suggestions that your partner will feel vital, alive, and fully charged with erotic energy and desire. Soon, you no longer have to give verbal “suggestions” – you both find yourself fully aroused and engaged in the hottest sex you’ve had in weeks.

These are just two types of simple erotic techniques that can be used to bring your body and your mind – and that of your lover – into erotic alignment. A burgeoning group of amateur, erotic hypnotists are using hypnosis to increase the intensity and variety of sensations, to have powerful fantasy experiences, and even to create and experience hypnotic orgasms. And much more!

Super-charge your love life by combining simple hypnosis with erotic stories and film plots, love poems, tantra techniques, and various forms of kinky play. Take turns playing the role of the hypnotist or the hypnotized subject, or even engage in mutual hypnosis! If you’re on your own, add self-hypnosis to an evening of self-pleasure and feel how easy it is to have even more fun than usual.

Click here for Erotic Hypnosis Safety & Consent tips.